Poetry Forum

Surrender You lie in you pit The hole of your own making. Whisky crystals cloud your mind And you surrender; To your own chaos. Door closes and you flinch, The aorta flicks As blood runs cold, And you die. Waves crash and fall and I see you Surrender; remembering A life full of regret. Oh lord have ...

Man, i hate vikings!
so full of sex and hatred
for those they control

Neglect. An arbitrary measure cast aside and long forgotten. Eaten by the snake that pours out its scorn. Licking sick lips You render me ill. Hair hangs damp and I vomit at will. Your lost eyes reveal all, filled to the brim with longing and cider. A viscious cancer sucking you up. It throws you do...

on a bendy bus
we ride not forgetting time
into the jaws of

Hilarious, favourite line is about Jesus "but that was a wispy little thing" i wonder what he would make of that comment? also enjoyed the idea that the beard has a life of its own and threatening to take over with its "intentions", great use of the word, i thoguht beards were qu...

hi
this is great, very funny, bizzare but mundane at the same time, reminds me of when i had magic mushrooms and was so sick the next day, which bizarrely did look like mushroom soup. never again.
x

hi, Loved this poem as it combines a love of writing with the mysteries of God and the mundaneness of life "put the kettle on and have a cup of tea". you lost me a little bit on the last stanza as i think it is too wordy though does have some great images. I'd suggest tidying it up and mak...

You bake, Toasted and Smouldering, like a lovers passion imploding. But what have you left? Heart shaped scald marks that brand you with the past. Oh, how you regret the idiocity of it all. Heart chambers closing like blood stained petals, refusing to let you go. The past has left its scent for othe...

Everyone peers through Edith's door, a lady gives her flowers and praise as Edith sinks in her chair. Polished vibrato, lipstick glistening hush as the legend takes her time to board the planks towards the sharks and the shooters. In Paris the night ignites, Edith takes the chic and the ego and weav...

I really like the "disco- dancing woman" line as it drew me in immediately and gives the poem a funky start. However i do agree with others that it is incongruous with the content of the poem. i imagine the woman to be wild, exciting, powerful, yet lonely and complicated. i love the line &...