Poetry Forum

thanks for the reviews guys and gals like your ideas kj, will bear it in mind point well taken have to say bombadil raises a good point, one i was indeed worried about :) it was all about imagery, sticks picked up on what i was trying to convey, i think my head was on that kinda thought train when i...

i thought this poem had some really powerful undertones and an accomplished and natural use of symbology and rhyme, however i wasn't all that keen on the third verse i'm afraid, sorry to say derek but i read the poem as being sttronger if the third verse isn't included. please please please know tha...

i think it's about time i reviewed one of yours derek!!! i loved the simplicity of this poem, as was said before we do live in a society obsessed with the passage of time, and i do think it's rather deliciously ironic to see the spirit of this summed up in a poem that takes such a short time to read...

k heres a more contempary attempt for you to mull over please enjoy, or not, the choice is yours

stumbling through white
cold fingers
blue eyes
cheeks raw and pink
falling feathers of ice
laying on a fur mantle
warm breath
escaping in clouds
pale lips tainted blue
a girl in snow

thanks lotz

sorry i didn't give you a longer review but i like your style and i'm glad u liked my romantic efforts

yes there was a muse for this perticular piece, and she truly is the most beautiful woman i have ever beheld enjoy! her beauty took my breath away she woke me with her smile a kiss like i had never felt it lingered for a while she ran her fingers through my hair continued down my spine brought them ...

hi,

love your first poem, was very profound and i loved the symbolism
your second was very sweet and touching
i'm afraid i didn't like the mode of your third, exellent poem but kind of scary and final a bit too much alanis morisette in that one

thanks cam,

yes i know it's a bit of a dated technique, and i shall try a more contempory style for my next effort, as i said i am after some constructive criticism it's better in my mind to be told what i could do to improve. point duly noted

thanks again

i find it's an interesting way to see what my mind looks like from time to time

and keeping the whirring mind quiet and subdued is always a bonus

just thought i'd introduce myself my names Matt i live in london and i like writing poems, some say i'm not that good but some say i'm fantastic, so i thought i'd get some nice anonymous opinions and see what other people have written as i love to see how other people write and get inspired so hi an...

hi i'd like to know what you guys think of a poem that i am writing at the moment, and i want some constructive criticism please, i would welcome all opinions, still nice comments are also appreciated :oops: the watchman sat upon the shore and gazed into the sky seated on his weathered throne he wat...