Poetry Forum

I AM A FUCKING QUEER!!!!

AND I LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH THE ODD SHEEP OR GOAT, SINCE THEY AREN'T AS PICKY AS OTHER QUEERS. I'M OVERWEIGHT, SORT OF PATHETIC AND STREET TRASH UGLY. I'M SAD.

I'M OFF TO SOD A DOG NOW.

Thank you all for your inputs.

I appreciate the interest.

I wil work on improving the poem and re-post after completion.

You see your world in black and white, shades or colour you deny When will your joy and pain unite? You keep your dreams in your pockets and spare none for those who weep Tell me when will I see you smile? You skip along so innocently yet in cords of grief you are coiled Tell me who will set you fre...

Into a cavern of open space, I shall descend Where the chaos of silence will mute my voice There will be peace for me I trod through the tar under the shadows of giants Among mechanical mules and their fumes and waste Pass contorted faces warped and dismayed Searching in vain for fortune and fame As...

Thanks Rachel,

I altered the format.

its amazing how women always seem to enjoy flirting more than guys do.

floating on a cushion of air, reddened with age & despair, the last leaf sinks to earth as a wounded soldier in mortal combat, bleeding through his gear, seeping strength through fear sunlight wanes as the darkness draws near, behind blackened eyes she stares, a shower of sand rains on her hair,...

Like a broken ornament in the rubble; you fit so well
Among the roots in the concrete jungle upon which you fell
Now there you lay infested with the filth of your own hell
Nose to the air the beasts stampede by enveloped in perfumed smells

a very hip poem. simple and neat. i agree with the 'lies' part also. it really would tie in. However i do feel like there are no real disparities in the stanzas. They are each basically repeating the same situation. since these events are taking place in the bedroom I believe the lines below fit in ...

Yes,

apparently a very personal poem. It seems to be a conversation with yourself and your obsessions. Am I right here?

but it does tend to be so personally influenced that little explanations are offered to the casual reader.

example:

'too much older than she,
and perhaps unwittingly aware'??

thank you. I believe you are right about those 2 words. But i am glad u got the message still. The title: I was trying for the visual of wearing a uniform that you do not feel comfortable in while standing infront of a mirror in disgust. the ending summarized the plot: Being different or unique is l...

I'm a dude. who loves his daughter. are we so far gone as a society that if a guy shows any form of affectionate behaviour what so ever he is forced to confirm his gender? don't tell me, you have a whole shitload of gay & sensitive guy jokes you have just been bursting to express right? p.s i li...

They like me, they really, really like me!

Thank you all. I shall continue to persevere guided by your immaculate knowledge and wry criticisms!

nice, very apt comparisons

'and dusted with cobwebs,
plucked from the cellar.

white and dusty
and littered with petals
that fell from the flower

picking through pieces
and remnants of you.'

I tried so hard to please the masses To be accepted, That inner yearning that tempts us all To be confided within social boundaries Standing before these earthly gates for eternal judgment Such a fool I am, happy in the bliss of conformity (?) Suppressed, depressed, none the less reduced to a singul...

hahaha,

ok Bombadil. For someone from 'God's Country' I see you have a 'Devil's Tongue' (typo edited before i lost my head)

i am not and was not offended.

your criticism was vague earlier. Now I understand, respect and will adhere to the points you brought up...my liege.

that was a really nice poem.

Quite funny with a macabre social commentary message attached.

I enjoyed that.

um.. thanks for the reply but uh.. do you ever try to decipher the meaning behind the poem or do you just always comment on rhyming or non rhyming words? did you get the premise of the poem? However i will take your advise and make my next poem with out rhyming words and try to appease the 'unstoned...

Why do you mock me, you of infinite power? Before whom kingdoms bow and nations cower Am I too much of an insignificant bother? You ignored me in life why should I beseech you in my final hour? Answer me not, spare not even a gaze For my existence is a flicker such are mortal days The complexity of ...

Thanks, i'll get better. I'm a quick learner.

Strip me naked and lay me open Whip my torso and scar my flesh Torture will not render me broken I fear not the cold grasp of death In the mist of darkness I reach out groping You refuse to guide my steps Submerged in your ocean I struggle, chocking You abandoned me to the depths Spending my nights ...

I guess it was sentimental, she being my first and only child. I couldn't help it.

I will work on the rhyme scheme though.

I am a lost soul seeking the warmth in your eyes To still my demons and quell my cries As fragile as you are you hold me stern and teach me lessons you have let to learn unconditional love you give to me cradle my broken heart and set it free my blood courses its way through your veins sweeping away...