Poetry Forum

Love it, really good

I've only heard Living For The Weekend & Cash Machine, but both songs are good

In no particular order: Penny Lane - The Beatles Carmina Burana - Carl Orff What's Going On - Marvin Gaye DOA - Foo Fighters The Sensual World - Kate Bush Butterflies and Hurricanes - Muse Let's Get It On (live) - Marvin Gaye Fools Gold - The Stone Roses Ultimate Song: What's Going On - Marvin Gaye ...

Doh! Don't feel tempted to leave, Yev. Perhaps you might be upset by that little row the other day, but personally, I've found the people here to be both friendly and helpful, as they have been in this thread

Well in my view, brilliant 'political' poetry like Dulce Et Decorum Est has a place on this forum, whereas my poetry has no place here

Thank you all for the mature response. But the sad fact remains...this poem is awful

Yep, maybe you're right, Barrie. It was a bit stupid of me to post it, actually. Sorry to any American people who may be offended by it.

Hi everyone, thanks for your comments :) The first stanza contains sentences from George Bush's keynote speech, after September 11th. Lines 1 & 2 in stanza two refer to the domestic surveillance furore taking place in the USA right now. The POV is deliberately confused/confusing in this poem (th...

We are awakened to danger,
At the mercy of strangers,
Who hate us for our freedoms,
Who will kill us without reason

So excuse us if we tap your phone,
Excuse us when we bug your home,
Please excuse the martial law -
Don't you drones know we're at war?

I absolutely love that, wonderful

Great work, Pseud, superb

Well done, Yevgeniya
It must be hard writing good poetry in a foreign language. I have a French friend who writes in English, and although the results are good, it takes her a long time to translate & ensure that the poem is decent in both English AND French.
So I salute your efforts

Mouldy old me, after a 12 hour shift
*checks that he spelt 'shift' correctly*
Phew...

Please bear in mind that I'm 38, and have had a very hard life

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v73/l ... EVEWED.jpg

That is truly exceptional, excellent

Thanks for the link

I just love the song lyrics, they're something like the poetry I'd like to write, if I was able to.

Now I've heard there was a secret chord That David played, and it pleased the Lord But you don't really care for music, do you? It goes like this The fourth, the fifth The minor fall, the major lift The baffled king composing Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Your faith was stro...

I foresaw the will of humankind And have so little to tell, A few brief lines of apology Then a sad, shame-faced farewell It was written on a bunker wall, Scratched with sharpened stone: 'I bequeath the death of Gaia To my heirs;a fallout zone. To my sisters, an icy wasteland Scarred by Heaven's bre...

Thanks for the feedback, Barrie, much appreciated

As children, we quested for adventure Under cool beach pebbles, within the crab's sanctuaries, In the patient arms of indulgent trees, pressed between flowers in fields That hadn't yet been sold off to the blissfully ignorant, Those who grasped the key of life at birth, and furiously polished it In ...

Thank you, Kris, I'll take a look
My poetic taste has always been for poets like Yeats & Shelley, so I'm pretty clueless about more modern poets and their style(s). I'd really like to write more contemporary poems though, so I'll read the works of the poets you recommended

Thanks for the advice, Barrie
I think you're right about this. Being rather untutored, I more or less assumed that all poetry must rhyme. I need to find out more about how to write decent poetry. Is there a particular thread in the 'Poetry Tutorial' forum that I should look at, you think?

Well, it's not a particularly 'deep' poem, Ray. So there's no deeper meaning to 'soul'. I guess that 'escapes into dreams that reveal my soul' (as in, reveals my true self) would have been an improvement.

This is the mask that hides my face, See me vanish without trace Behind the persona of my disguise, A Pierrot doll with human eyes Here is the voice that speaks for me, Harsh sentence of reality, Hard talk that only shields the truth And tears the love away from you Bound is the body where I live, A...

Excellent poem

I'm sorry I can only critique it with the above words, but I don't know enough about the technical aspects of poetry yet. But for what it's worth, I was very impressed with the poem

"Aryan" is nothing but a misappropriation of a word by the nazi scumbags, and to use it in the sense that they meant it is to endorse that sense of "Aryan" and further misappropriate it. Sorry Steve. Blame the Judische in me. Apologies if it bothers you. Ah, sorry Ray, I didn't ...