Poetry Forum

Thank you for your constructive comments.

Lonely Hearts Club Feeling small and lonely. Place is too big, enormous really. Have a mate here but can’t get near him. To be honest, we’ve never met And at this rate not likely to. There are others around But they live on a different level Some are attractive, others repel me. Suppose I should mix...

Quite deep. An insight into how the subculture inhabitants think and reason. Quite a disturbing piece and topical.

Nice and simple. Don't follow the "Broadhead" line though. Enjoyed.

Thank you gbn for your input.

Thank you Kev and Aleph. Appreciate your input.

Brave New World –Revisited I’m leaving the sea tomorrow, because I think I can. Been here for ages, it’s time for a change. Of course there will be worries and fears, what to eat, the loneliness of being first. But I think I’m well equipped, I have everything I need. If it doesn’t work out I can alw...

This is a fun piece.Would the devil be looking down at the world? Found it a little difficult to know who was saying what, the Devil or God. Again, I'm a bit thick. Overall I enjoyed it. Good work.

OK thanks,duly noted.

Really like this. No hidden meanings or subtleties, tells it like it is. This comes from the heart and the style suits the content so well.

Of DNA What is in my head; this germ of genius that rises from the masses, unique and deeply welling. From generations gone and yet still here. Perpetuating threads and thoughts, all telling of old genes' intrinsic measure. Each gem, each treasure I will savour. And as the light bursts through with ...

Yes, very direct. The futility and starkness comes through vividly. I wondered though if some more oblique and subtle references to this difficult period would lend more punch to the story. It's very much in-your-face but perhaps that was your intention. Overall an interesting and enjoyable observat...

Zany and funny.Is there any connection between each poem or are they just random thoughts?
Maybe the PG tips one is more a one line quip than a poem but overall quite a quirky and fun piece.

Thank you all for your constructive and accurate crit.I woke up one morning with the idea for this piece in my head and hurriedly wrote it out. The words seemed to have a life of their own and just spilled on to the paper. Never having written anything before (but learning quickly) I can see that id...

The Demon Within (Rev 1) I am in a strange land; I do not comprehend. They speak a familiar language but one I can not interpret. I try to join this band. Today I can. Yet further ahead I now know, I go my own way. Has it always been so. Sometimes it seems not. But when I view from here, the black c...

Really like this. I like the flow and reiteration of the ideas. I'm struggling to place who the target is though.Partner, lost love, family member? I felt that if another half dozen lines or so were added to give some closure or finality to the piece,then this would make this an excellent effort. As...

Good content here and the revisions help. Being of a scientific background I can see the message which comes across. One small point: prokaryotes by their definition are unicellullar so there may be a duplication of ideas here.
Still,it's an interesting piece of work. Well done.

Just joined, so saying hello to everyone.No formal poetry background but have been writing for a while for my own cathartic purposes. When an idea pops in to mind and I take pen to paper, the words and phrases just seem to spill out with a will of their own. Whether they can be described as poetry r...