Poetry Forum

It has become somewhat similar to a route march, End of walk. End of tether. No longer a stroll as the heavens threaten with grey cumulus snarls, and little mutt at my heels, tripping over tangled pendulums in his eagerness to stay by my side, Ignoring lupine best sense in his attempts. Almost succe...

Again, to re-iterate previous points, I do love the first line. I wonder if the use of 'martial' is a clever play on the poet himself, tying in with his epigrams depicting human life and satirising city living? Were you meaning Janus in terms of change and transitions such as maturing young boys or ...

I like the half rhyme of 'vaulting' and 'halls' , contrasting nicely with the final line of that stanza, which brings it neatly to a close. Possibly needing punctuation between 'every note was permanent' and 'it never rang out' - and I'm not convinced that the last line works in this, perhaps 'pain ...

Hullo - after a long absence I clicked on this and grinned widely... I love the imagery conveyed - 'bullrush cotton' is perfect. The first stanza reflects, to my eyes, the wavelike motion of ripples, the sigmoid shape is in keeping with the essence of the poem, and the gentle words are carefully cho...

Mint chocolate is ace - strawberry chocolate is slightly better....
What kind of zoology do you do Dave? Where bouts in Dublin are you? I originate from Palmerstown (well, my ma does)

Thank you so very much! Midori is a green, rather disgusting looking spirit that is mixed to make green, rather disgusting looking cocktails... and the line with the flip-flop is clumsy now I re-read it, possibly could have done without that. I am really touched at your comments and an upgrade - yay...

Melbourne balm. Midori spliced between cerebellar folds. We were untouchable, do you remember? Beloved; almost. I forgave your perfection, grew to admire it. Bare feet. The mind retches back drunken moments. Sand-worn soles and sun-weathered arms. Blue ribbon. I grew tolerant to second place, grew t...

I read this because I found a rather huge moth the other day and the title reminded me - I love your use of form to make what, in my eyes, looks like a large slender flame on the page. The alternate rhyming lines tie the words together and, when read aloud, are like a drum beat which makes the poem ...

I love this poem, and it reminds me of how I strive to write. The first line is beautiful, and your form on the page reminds me instantly of the breathing you talk about all the way through. The tenderness with which you write is juxtaposed beautifully against the almost startling sentiment of loss ...

Hey, I'm very new to this site and this is my first critique/comment on a poem (well since English A-level)... The lack of capitals is both intriguing and vaguely perturbing to me as I read through. The intermittent commas mean this is not read as a continuous prose, but the lack of title capitals m...

The quandry is how to write something about oneself without being too self-deprecating, tedious or generally obnoxious... My name is Kate. I'm currently studying to be a veterinary surgeon therefore, in theory, creative writing of any kind is basically the antithesis of my scientifically orientated ...