Poetry Forum

Wow. Something powerful going on here I think. The first five lines reeled me in, although I didn't see why there were quotation marks round 'oxygen of happiness'. Maybe I'm missing something? I thought 'The lights are on but no one's answering' perhaps a variation on something of a cliche theme. I'...

Thanks very much for the comments. I've never heard of The Sundering Flood; I've just Googled it. Sounds interesting. Barrie, your point about equal opportunities made me laugh! This was written about a real person, and the 'dark skin, dark hair, crimson dress' line was intensely personal, but I do ...

The Bridge The river headed for the sea Growling slowly through the town The foreign banks, so far apart Neither to the other known The current coursed, the undertow Resisted hard the great North Sea No ferryman to pull across No strength to swim across to me She lingered on the other side Dark ski...

I loved it. Intriguing title, great use of juxtaposition of the old (chiselling) and new (googling). Are the last two lines - which are great - directing the reader to the futility of life? I thought that there was more humour in it than despair or resignation. Hope I'm right.

Kerri x

Hi, What an intriguing piece of writing. It contains some fantastic lines; "Let you rise, red ball, I cannot stop you", "first-shot wives", etc. Really nice phrases to get your tongue around. I found the pop music references in the "Sweet Dreams" verse interesting; I wo...

Thanks for the welcomes. I will be sticking strictly to the beginners' section, but will read a little more before posting any of mine ... the quality of the ones I've read so far makes me start to feel that I may be a little out of my depth here!

Hi, this is my first ever critique, so please bear with me. I enjoyed this. It seems designed to be read out loud, which always works well for me. I appreciated the rhythm and the title, The Ageing Fleet of Half Moon Bay, is evocative. I wonder if there is such a place as Half Moon Bay; the poem mad...

Hi,

I stumbled across this excellent site a couple of days ago whilst tentatively looking for a safe place to post a couple of the poems I have just started writing again after a gap of some years. I look forward to participating and to getting to know a few people.

Kerri