Poetry Forum

TY guys for stoppin and reading so carefully...good comments too. Here are a couple of links that may help clear things up. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flarf http://ronsilliman.blogspot.com/ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyrian_dye Hope this helps clear thing up a lil. JR P.S. i was not trying to wr...

Hey ded i really like this poem!! The beginning is my fav....the dedication to girls whoplay grown up games is an instant classic in my book!! I do have a couple of nits tho. ... and Midori, Kumi, Haru, Natashka, Shoko, Keiko, Kate, Tomoko, Marie and all the other sweet girls who like to play grownu...

Dye, Sonnet The violet drop wraps his reflection before it falls, face reversed & sun-folded. Pushing blood purple into Tyrian garments the old way until his hands ache dark snails. Now dyeing has gone industrial, number values assigned per molecule. A ruined woman in fading garments. Sharon Old...

Hey Donjaun : have to tell u i loved this poem. I didn't have any trouble with the line breaks or timing or form at all...i thouht it fit the content rather well. The images were stand out and so vivid/simplistic that i wonder how many times u edited this BEFORE posting. In a world f wordsmiths this...

Hey Dead: Since i live smack-dab in the heart of hillbilly country i feel compelled(if not overly qualified) to comment on this poem! I thought this whole write was funnnnny.... i do have a couple of crits tho....maybe thoughts on improvement if u really want this to sound low-brow American. So let ...

Hey guys Ty for the insightful comments! I learned alot by posting this poem here.....and relearned a few things as well. A few introductory thoughts: the line breaks are being revised as we speak, the ending is being tinkered with and finally, the cliches...world worn words r thesaurused. Wabz: TY ...

Beyond Sight He smells the grain wet with sun and more sun as he walks through the field, letting golden stars lap his hands. Is confused by stars . The stalks become particles become electric pulse electric become his heart. The way he uses his hands to touch the world, the interior being uses his ...

A few thoughts Philly: it's hard to read all yur stuff in Italics, try italisizing the pertinet issues or ppl speaking. Dont quote yourself when
u wanna make a fresh statement.

Hey Elphin: i am not usually a rhyme guy but sing-song quality this has makes it feel(as others pointed out)like its 72 again. It is unusual that the conetnt is not musical bu tu can make the poem that way and still add some sense to it. Great job. My only problem was the almost nuerotic alliteratio...

Hey Philly: since its the first poem u've eva written i'll hold back a lil. U have some poetic feel here: The rain's hammering on the glass like a fist Stay away from time-worn, ad nausem staements such as these: glimmer of hope secret to be told love is blind I'll never forget the first kiss dark w...

Hey Dave: I thought this was a unique lil write....playful thru out and then somber at the end. I craked at

e-lefven-oh-fy-eve,

fuuuuny stuuuff. The last strophe is what this poem is all about....adds sum serious depth.