Humor In Life

[LunarTree]

I heard a rumor,
about my humor;
Some say its quite extreme.

And yes i do laugh,
and no i don't dance;
At things that make some squirm.

But what they don't see,
is what i truly believe;
To laugh or cry are our option's.

So while you cry,
sob and moan;
Watch me laugh hysterically.

And then just think,
wouldn't you like to be me;
A man who finds humor in life.

I want to thank everyone who has helped with this (exceplly the spelling, grammer etc) possibly the best welcome to any forum i have ever joined THANK YOU

[Arian]

Always good to see a new member, so welcome.

I quite like the first stanza of this, though I think it's a bit of an Aunt Sally.

Be good to see a version which had the literals ironed out of it (that is, correctly puntuated, spelled etc).

Cheers
peter

[RichardSanders]

For some reason I stumbled on the first stanza and read:

I heard a rumor
About my humor
Some say it's like a tumor.

lol.

Sorry for this useless feedback.
I'll try to forget my misread and come back later with some usefull feedback.


Kindest,
Richard

[LunarTree]

Thank you for the feed back means a lot. Tumor killed me very funny now i have it in my head haha
Sadly on the spelling and puncuation side of things i am a bit Dyslex (i dont even know is thats spelt right ) but will see if i can pick out any thing obvious.

[RichardSanders]

To help you along with the spelling and punctuation. (note: this is how I read it. That's not nescessarily the right or only way.)

I heard a rumor
about my humor;
Some say it's quite extreme.

And yes, I do laugh;
and no, I don't dance;
at things that make some squirm.

But what they don't see,
is what I truly believe;
To laugh or cry are our options.

So while you cry,
sob and moan;
Watch me laugh hysterically.

And then just think,
wouldn't you like to be me;
A man who finds humor in life.

[Thoth]

Hehe

This is whacky! It started like a limerick I heard somewhere which went something like:

There once was a rumor of animal humor,
considered by some quite extreme.
We all had a laugh at a crazy giraffe
who sat in tub of ice scream.

(But I admit I ad-libbed a bit)

My I suggest dropping the capital at each line start and please use a capital “I”
“its” should be “it’s”

[Lake]

Hi LunarTree,

Are you the laurel in the moon? A light-hearted read indeed.
I agree with others about capital letters, apostrophes, etc. But if you say you are Dyslex, that's really a big challenge.

Nice to see you,
Lake

[LunarTree]

Right i think i have changed the spelling / grammer correctly, i think with time once i have written a few of these i will get the hang of it.


THANK YOU all soooo much for your help and feedback much appricated.

Cheers
Tom

[Alucinary]

Tom,

Don't be put off - I'm a fellow dyslexic (though there are differing severities and levels of subconsious coping strategies and I know it can be pretty challenging / frustrating at times).

I was very amused when I read the comment from Thoth our South African friend as I had initially misread squirm as scream myself so perhaps I have too heard the animal limerick previously!?

I would suggest changing S3 so that it reads:

But what they don't see,
I truly believe;
To laugh or cry are our options.

and I think I would lose the last stanza entirely myself...

It was certainly a fun poem to read

Alucinary.

[EatMyPoetry]

I LOVE the subject - a great outlook on life to have.

I'm struggling to pick up a rhythm unfortunately, maybe it's there and I'm not reading it properly

All in all I like my poetry a bit more vague and cryptic but that's just a personal preference. As a straight-to-the-point poem this was enjoyable to read