Breathe

New to poetry? Unsure about the quality of your work? Then why not post here to receive some gentle feedback.
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jcmcarthy
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2015 5:59 pm

Fri Jan 09, 2015 10:17 pm

Upon these heady waves,
We search for a new found land,
Beneath the cliffs,
Yet above the sea,
We find our beach of perfect gold,
A place where we may lay our hands,
And rest our bones,
A place never to feel alone,
For although we be by ourselves,
The water, the rocks, the sand and the air,
All offer us company in the sounds,
This place of contentment and classical voices,
Shall lift us up and away,
To what is brighter beyond the cliffs,
Take it easy,
Relax,
Breathe.
Macavity
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 11987
Joined: Tue May 10, 2005 10:29 am

Sat Jan 10, 2015 1:52 pm

hi jc

Sounds like a nice place to be. Interesting phrase 'classical voices'. Made me think - perhaps this is what Debussy was seeking to capture.

all the best

mac
Mayflower
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2015 6:02 pm

Sat Aug 15, 2015 7:49 pm

jcmcarthy wrote:Upon these heady waves,
We search for a new found land,
Beneath the cliffs,
Yet above the sea,
We find our beach of perfect gold,
A place where we may lay our hands,
And rest our bones,
A place never to feel alone,
For although we be by ourselves,
The water, the rocks, the sand and the air,
All offer us company in the sounds,
This place of contentment and classical voices,
Shall lift us up and away,
To what is brighter beyond the cliffs,
Take it easy,
Relax,
Breathe.
I felt relaxed reading this piece.
My get away is the beach and you took me to my favourite place through words.
Loved it.
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