Wind and Departure

[jisbell00]

Wind and Departure


The wind that moves all things into the present –
the sun, the distant stars – has brought its share
of flotsam to my heart. For thus the lost,
the dead live on as we do. They exist
in those who knew them. My heart won’t mark off,
it makes room for all those who touched my face.

And up I summon those Time has erased,
to my heart’s chambers. As I rest my hand
on my warm forehead, in that midnight hour
the press of day has left, I am engulfed
in bittersweet remembrance. And the wind
blows on across my hand, across my forehead,
across my cluttered desk, across the night
beyond the double glazing where the dogs
are speaking yet, across the weary miles
that span this planet, the uncountable
abyss of space. We move into today
as one, there is no holding us. The past
is not yet past. The dead are not yet dead.


 

[ray miller]

Really good, I think. One of your best.

For thus the lost,
the dead live on as we do. We exist
in those who know us.

Or perhaps They exist in those who knew them.
It's not really a criticism but the introduction of double glazing made me smile. It seems almost satirical.

[jisbell00]

Hi Ray,

Thanks for the suggestion - edit duly made!

Yes, I like double glazing because it so often mediates our encounter with nature and it is in itself so artificial as to be almost kitsch. But there it is, shaping our days.

Glad you enjoyed the poem! This is still from the MS. Broccoli and Duty, which I never send off anywhere. But then, i do have a lot of MSS!

Cheers,
John

[Leaf]

Ooh yes, well done, John. No nits to speak of as yet, but we'll return if any appear 🪳

This would be well worth submitting somewhere, we think (^v^)

Cheerie,
F & ( v ) (sleepy again!)

[jisbell00]

What a kind thought, Fliss and Coo! I am just preparing a submission for Amethyst, which reopens in November, but shall perhaps look at Snakeskin for this one.

Cheerie,
John

[Leaf]

A kind thought well deserved, John. We're happy to read that you're preparing a submission for Amethyst; we might do likewise, work permitting. We wish you every success with Snakeskin too!

Cheerie,
F & (^v^)

[Mharr2000]

thanks for this poem is this a prose?

Im still trying to work out the differences between styles and i find it has a good rhythm and love the meaning behind it physically we die but spiritually we live on in hearts and memories loved that meaning.

[jisbell00]

Hi Mharr,

You are I think exactly right on your read as to this poem's meaning. It's about what survives - what is left behind - when those we love come to die. I would argue that our lvoed ones live on in our memories until we die in our turn. When we remember their exact tone of voice, their exact face, they are living in that moment.

As for the music of the piece, this is iambic pentameter. Shakespeare for instance wrote endless iambic pentameter. The classic form is this

ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum.

But it has room for a whole lot of tweaks to make it come alive and sing. For instance, here's a bit of Macbeth:

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time.

The middle line there is pretty fregular, but the opening line has an extra beat at the end (that's called a feminine ending), and the last line is just wild. Shakespeare was a genius, obviously, but lots of poets who use iambic pentameter will mix it up. It's the most famous metrical form in English poetry, and it's been around for at least seven hundred years, so it's good to vary it and mnot just go ti-tum ti-tum.

Oh: this format

ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum

is iambic tetrameter or tet for short. It's good for light verse, like this:

The chief defect of Henry King
Was chewing little bits of string.

penta in Greek means five, tetra means four, and that's how these forms got their names. One has five beats, the other four.

Cheers,
John