Google Me

New to poetry? Unsure about the quality of your work? Then why not post here to receive some gentle feedback.
Post Reply
Elphin
Perspicacious Poster
Perspicacious Poster
Posts: 2944
Joined: Thu Jun 28, 2007 4:10 pm

Tue Aug 07, 2007 3:24 pm

Google Me

On his death notice we chiselled the clichés
passed away and bravely borne
and so on
and so on
with a roll call of roles;
father, husband, loving brother,
then we buried him,
snacked on the stories,
slapped his now dead back
and got on with our lives.

When I depart
will there be more than that?
Google me!

You will see
business relocation,
facilities fabrication,
bio-information application,
all done in my name
in the search for me;
the me who thought like Vonnegut
"People are idiots not to write poems
or to try to paint pictures
or to dance
or to write a piece of music
just because they can't make a living."

I spend my life troubleshooting
this gear noise and vibration.
kerri
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Jul 06, 2007 2:25 pm
Location: UK

Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:21 am

I loved it. Intriguing title, great use of juxtaposition of the old (chiselling) and new (googling). Are the last two lines - which are great - directing the reader to the futility of life? I thought that there was more humour in it than despair or resignation. Hope I'm right.

Kerri x
User avatar
barrie
Perspicacious Poster
Perspicacious Poster
Posts: 6069
Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2005 1:13 am
Location: lake district

Wed Aug 08, 2007 12:13 pm

What will we leave behind? Hardy was preoccupied with this question too. I wonder what he would have thought of the Googling idea?
I enjoyed this, it's fresh and original (to me). The Vonnegut quotation slotted in perfectly, and you complemented it nicely with the final couplet.

Practicing the arts is not a way to make a living. It's a way to make your soul grow."

good one

Barrie
beautifulloser
Preponderant Poster
Preponderant Poster
Posts: 934
Joined: Fri May 26, 2006 11:03 pm
Location: South Of Watford
Contact:

Wed Aug 08, 2007 3:01 pm

Love the humour in:

business relocation,
facilities fabrication,
bio-information application,
all done in my name

Think most people have googled themselves and returned interesting results.

I liked the meaning in the following:

People are idiots not to write poems
or to try to paint pictures
or to dance

or to write a piece of music
just because they can't make a living."

I spend my life troubleshooting
this gear noise and vibration

I'd agree with Barrie, nice ending.

Nicely done, different to the usual read.

BL
x
I'm sick of it, sick of it all. I know I'm right and I don't give a shit!
Elphin
Perspicacious Poster
Perspicacious Poster
Posts: 2944
Joined: Thu Jun 28, 2007 4:10 pm

Fri Aug 10, 2007 8:51 pm

Everyone - thank you.

Kerry - you are right its not about futility but the challenge of doing something for the soul while making a living. Hopefully the piece imparts that with a mixture of seriousness and a wry humour. Troubleshooting gear noise and vibration seemed an apt description of what we experience in balancing the demands of everyday life with whatever we have that is creative. Don't mean to sound pompous, hopefully you know what I mean.

Barrie, I always appreciate your encouragement. Hardy - Googling now that has given me an idea that I might get to.

BL - thanks.

Incidentally, the third stanza was almost entirely constructed from phrases in Google on my name, the fun was arranging them.
Post Reply