Haiku Train

New to poetry? Unsure about the quality of your work? Then why not post here to receive some gentle feedback.
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barrie
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Location: lake district

Fri Nov 23, 2007 5:18 pm

Fight under the ground,
the struggle for Tartarus -
Hades can keep it!
juliadebeauvoir
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Location: East of Eden

Fri Nov 23, 2007 5:59 pm

Hades can keep it!
Its hotter than hell in there!
I'm just feeling faint.
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
kozmikdave
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Location: Brisbane, Australia

Sun Nov 25, 2007 4:36 am

I'm just feeling faint -
my image in the mirror
is as bold as brass.
juliadebeauvoir
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Sun Nov 25, 2007 5:03 am

Is as bold as brass,
is as green as summer grass,
is as fat as your...

:twisted:
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
Lake
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Location: Sky Blue Waters

Sun Nov 25, 2007 6:30 am

Is as fat as your
lazy cat that catches no
mouse. A peaceful world.
juliadebeauvoir
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Location: East of Eden

Sun Nov 25, 2007 12:54 pm

Mouse. A peaceful world,
until some human spoils it
with screams and a broom!
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
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barrie
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Location: lake district

Sun Nov 25, 2007 11:34 pm

With screams and a broom
she sweeps the murder room clean,
with no stone unturned.
kozmikdave
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Mon Nov 26, 2007 12:42 am

With no stone unturned,
and indeed, no tern unstoned,
his stash uncovered.
juliadebeauvoir
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Location: East of Eden

Mon Nov 26, 2007 12:58 am

His stash uncovered.
Police wrecked his apartment.
Inconsiderate!
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
rye
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:25 pm

Mon Nov 26, 2007 1:05 am

cops found stoned tern crashed
confiscated the cash cache
evidence of stash
kozmikdave
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Mon Nov 26, 2007 9:41 am

Evidence of stash
seen hanging from nostril hairs -
get me an airbrush.
Elphin
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Mon Nov 26, 2007 10:04 am

get me an airbrush
I'll stand at the mirror - sing
and play air guitar
juliadebeauvoir
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Mon Nov 26, 2007 1:27 pm

And play air guitar,
pretend I'm Jimi Hendrix.
Axis: Bold as Love.
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
rye
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:25 pm

Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:01 pm

Axis: Bold as Love
boo'd; crashed, awoke super glued
stoned tern seeps fowl mood
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barrie
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Tue Nov 27, 2007 4:45 pm

stoned tern seeps fowl mood -
now guess which word should come next.
I haven't a clue.
Elphin
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Tue Nov 27, 2007 4:51 pm

I haven't a clue.
crossword puzzle - two across,
its an anagram.
juliadebeauvoir
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Tue Nov 27, 2007 4:52 pm

Its an anagram,
or an anagrandfather.
I'm just not sure which.
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you."
rye
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:25 pm

Tue Nov 27, 2007 5:43 pm

I'm just not sure which
it was one or the other
someone may have switched
Travis
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antispam: no

Tue Nov 27, 2007 8:37 pm

Someone may have switched
bodies with someone else in
an old Star Trek show.
kozmikdave
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Wed Nov 28, 2007 12:49 am

An old Star Trek show -
always good for one-liners -
alien pick-up lines.
Lake
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Wed Nov 28, 2007 6:06 pm

Aliens, pick-up lines;
Domestics, dance to rhythms.
Universal day.
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barrie
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Wed Nov 28, 2007 11:45 pm

Universal day
turns to Universal night -
then the next Big Bang.
kozmikdave
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Thu Nov 29, 2007 12:22 am

then the next Big Bang
might really be a collapse -
call it the Big Suck.
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barrie
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Location: lake district

Sat Dec 01, 2007 10:47 pm

Call it the Big Suck -
the sub-prime loan dilemma.
Feel the overdraught.
Jack Cloverfield
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Location: Oxfordshire

Sat Dec 01, 2007 11:06 pm

Is it a moment
When summer eyes look too far
And miss the sunset?
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