Poetry Forum

**
electric arcs
dissect looming clouds--
a rain dies suddenly

**
loony beggar
scrutinizes
my uneasiness

**

melancholy elbows
press against table top--
one dragonfly wanders

**

teardrop
rolls down a frail cheek--
mélange of sunset hues

**

end of bridge
lost in fog--
she looks at me

**
row of Moai
watch moon rise
through centuries

**

[ 'Moai' : http://www.answers.com/topic/moai]

I thought of this like it was a stream of consciousness poem--but hardly think its without any reason. If you really keep reading you sense a 'meloncholy' about the poem. You could even switch the verses around or lines. It made me want to play with it so I hope you don't mind.

electric arcs
dissect looming clouds--
a rain dies suddenly
end of bridge
lost in fog--
she looks at me
teardrop
rolls down a frail cheek--
mélange of sunset hues
melancholy elbows
press against table top--
scrutinizes
my uneasiness

Or take the last line from each verse:

one dragonfly wanders
a rain dies suddenly
mélange of sunset hues
my uneasiness

she looks at me
through centuries

So, imo everything works and has a real reason behind it. I think this was a good excercise in 'letting go' of the typical "I must write this poem in a chronological and sensical order.'

Bella

Thanks Bella for your thoughts and suggestions. I actually tried out a string of Ku poetry. Thank you.

Each line says so much, in the space of only 3-4 words. A very nice poem!

Best
Mark

Thanks Mark for your reply.

I'll drink to this.

It doesn't need reason Aru, when the words are as beautiful as this.

My kind of moodiness....

Lx

Thank you for saying that, Lovely. Smiles.