every now and then

[arunansu]

A cool breeze
teases sunflowers
by the window.

The florets waggle
as if they’re eager
to be gently caressed.
As if they know beforehand
that the stranger’s knock on my door
his calling of my name with a yawny voice
would make me part ways
with an unforgiving muse.

The worn-out summer walks in
leisurely, reclines on a couch and observes
the wind tugging at its playthings.
The playthings nod knowingly.
My visitor pauses
in between our soft discourse.

[FP7]

Hello Aru - was good to read your stuff again. I thought this was a strong one.

I really enjoyed the first three lines with the breeze teasing. I can imagine the florets (weird word to choose, but it works for me...!) waggling.

The only bit of the poem that didn't run on nicely to the next, for me, was the stranger-at-the-door bit - I thought: 'the stranger’s knock on my door/his calling of my name with a yawny voice' didn't work that well and confused me later when I couldn't work out whether the stranger was worn-out Summer or not. It was summer right?

I thought the feel of the poem was very good, mate - thanks,

Stephen

[arunansu]

Stephen,
Tank you for being here. Yes it was the summer. That's why I addressed 'him' as my visitor. Thanks.

[Danté]

Aru, an enjoyable piece. I like the personifications and wonder if this line is actually adding anything to the poem "The playthings nod knowingly."

Thanks for a pleasant read

regards

Danté

[arunansu]

Thanks Dante. Yes I agree that line was a filler. Smiles.

[Lovely]

You good I'm fucked

Dizzy

[arunansu]

Lol.

[anniecat]

I love your works my friend

[KevJ]

Another gorgeous read Aru. Ain't the summer wonderful.

[arunansu]

Thank you Annie, thank you Kev. Well, the summer in Kolkata is anything but gorgeous! Its sticky, prickly and scorching!

[leylarose]

lovely personification here, no critique to add to the above, beautiful job = )

[arunansu]

Thanks again, L, for praising my poem. Smiles.