Vixen

[David Smedley]

She slips from beneath the garden shed
like a commando;

propels herself with cunning elbows
and belly deep slinking into moonlight

that slicks her black
as she calls to kith and kin.

[Jackie]

Cool, David. I love her as a commando. Did she get anything in the garden? I thought she might have something in her mouth—but then she couldn't call out.

Is she slipping under a wall? A fence? It's hard to imagine slipping under a shed. And maybe belly slinking? Why belly deep?

Jackie

[1lankest]

Hi David,

Really like this.
Could it be

Propelled with cunning elbows ?

Luke

[brokenbridge]

Hi David

Yep, liked this.

I do however, and this is purely for my own reading reasons, think that you could do without the "like a" commando, and merely have


She slips from beneath the garden shed-
a commando;

propels herself with cunning elbows
and belly deep slinking into moonlight

that slicks her black
as she calls to kith and kin.

Not sure if I have the grammer right after shed, but I think you get the idea.

anyhow nice little poem either way


Best Regards

Vincent

[David]

I like this too, David. My only problem with it is an anatomical one: does a fox have elbows? I have often had this argument with my wife about our cat. Mrs D maintains that she (the cat!) has elbows, and I don't agree. It's a matter of honest ignorance on my part. That aside, it's a great image you've evoked.

Cheers

David

[David Smedley]

Hi Jackie, we have loads of "urban foxes" here, they actually live in some gardens, I hoped that "garden" may give rise as to what she was "slinking" through.

Luke, thank you for the post I like your suggestion.

Brokenbridge, regards, I like your format too.

David, I am like your wife, I alays think of my dog as having elbows, and that is where my thought came from for the vixen,

THANKS ALL.....David