Poetry Forum

A quick missive..

Let's all stand up and right the wrongs, put the world to right
Sit and talk of genocide and all that other shite
A united voice that gives us choice to right the wrongs that matter
No! What we really need to do is stand up to Sepp Blatter.

It's a good point, Gb. Frankie Boyle made a very similar point in the Guardian this week - http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfre ... l-thatcher ... perhaps Sepp Blatter is just a monstrous panto distraction from the really important stuff.

Yes, agreed. The important thing about Blatter is that he's foreign. There's a belief in this country that bribery and corruption is something others do - despite all the evidence to the contrary.
For a 4 line poem there's a lot of repetition - right the wrongs, world to rights, right the wrongs(again).

Let's all stand up and put the world right
Sit and talk of genocide and all that other shite
A united voice that gives us choice to change the things that matter
No! What we really need to do is stand up to Sepp Blatter.


Thanks for comments, was a bit of a knee jerk reaction, think above reads better..?

yes it's better , gets the point over without the verbal clutter of the original. An appropriate comment on the relative blather of important and much less important we experience nowadays.
regards, c.

I'm not usually squeamish, or sensitive to such things, but lumping genocide in with "all that other shite", in a poem about corruption in sports administration, just seems very very wrong.

B.

Agree with the above, also I feel the poem would be made stronger by adding other examples, no shortage of 'ight' rhymes.

brianedwards wrote:I'm not usually squeamish, or sensitive to such things, but lumping genocide in with "all that other shite", in a poem about corruption in sports administration, just seems very very wrong.

B.

I agree with you but this line highlights that more people wish to talk about Blatter than genocide, unfortunately.