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Naked Analysis

Posted: Mon Jan 13, 2020 10:59 am
by MartinT
Naked Analysis

Two sessions then a break
No cuddling just proximity
No need for a couch
Eyes not facing
Just lying besides

Re: Naked Analysis

Posted: Mon Jan 13, 2020 11:29 am
by NotQuiteSure
.
Hi Martin,
successfully succinct. Except for L4.
Maybe

Two sessions then a break
No cuddling just proximity
Just lying besides
No need for the couch


Regards, Not

.

Re: Naked Analysis

Posted: Tue Jan 14, 2020 6:35 pm
by Poet
MartinT wrote:
Mon Jan 13, 2020 10:59 am
Naked Analysis

Two sessions then a break
No cuddling just proximity
No need for a couch
Eyes not facing
Just lying besides (I think you mean beside instead of besides, make those changes)
Overall I thought the poem was witty and full of meaning, good job! Good luck with your writing.

Re: Naked Analysis

Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 3:31 am
by Jackie
Hi Martin,

Could this be a bit too brief? I see it saying that two naked people in proximity can produce the same result as a visit to an analyst. It's an interesting comment on a process, but a process getting from what problem to what result? I don't get a sense of place, or of what you felt like before and after.

Thanks for the read,
Jackie