Bone
Bone
I set the bone upon the stream,
and it descends, in leap and start,
to where the air is but a dream.
I see it yet, I have that art.
Its color might be clotted cream.
The text it bears, I shan’t impart.
Things are not always as they seem:
they are not ours – they stand apart.
And in the stream, the fishes come
to kiss the bone again to life.
It has forgotten hand and knife,
division and delirium.
It sits upon its rocky bed
as if the rocks, not it, were dead.
I set the bone upon the stream,
and it descends, in leap and start,
to where the air is but a dream.
I see it yet, I have that art.
Its color might be clotted cream.
The text it bears, I shan’t impart.
Things are not always as they seem:
they are not ours – they stand apart.
And in the stream, the fishes come
to kiss the bone again to life.
It has forgotten hand and knife,
division and delirium.
It sits upon its rocky bed
as if the rocks, not it, were dead.
Last edited by jisbell00 on Mon Sep 04, 2023 3:47 pm, edited 2 times in total.
John, this is great. It might sound embarrassing but it reminded me of Blake - semi fable, semi- parable.
Not sure why you changed the stanza scheme in the last two verses, but hey, still good
T
Not sure why you changed the stanza scheme in the last two verses, but hey, still good
T
Counting the beats,
Counting the slow heart beats,
The bleeding to death of time in slow heart beats,
Wakeful they lie.
Robert Graves
Counting the slow heart beats,
The bleeding to death of time in slow heart beats,
Wakeful they lie.
Robert Graves
Thank you, Ton - I wanted this to feel like it means more than it says, so it's very good to hear that came through. And I'm always happy to be compared to Blake!
The form is a Petrarchan sonnet, which goes 4-4-3-3 instead of Shakespeare's 4-4-4-2. It's very common in French or Italian poetry, for instance.
Cheers,
John
The form is a Petrarchan sonnet, which goes 4-4-3-3 instead of Shakespeare's 4-4-4-2. It's very common in French or Italian poetry, for instance.
Cheers,
John
John, I love the rhyme and rhythm although it is a slightly bizarre poem. On a literal and slightly dark level I'm interested to hear about how N disposed of the body. The bone is now sleeping with the fishes as the mafia might say.
We tend to feed the ducks with oats or stale bread rather than left over chicken in my area
But you're giving that dead bone a new life so I shouldn't let my imagination whip it into an eddy current frenzy. The rocks are alive and I don't know why I'm questioning that... I accepted something similar in Neverending Story too.
We tend to feed the ducks with oats or stale bread rather than left over chicken in my area
But you're giving that dead bone a new life so I shouldn't let my imagination whip it into an eddy current frenzy. The rocks are alive and I don't know why I'm questioning that... I accepted something similar in Neverending Story too.
Hi Morph,
Glad you enjoyed the music! As for the bone and how it came to be, I think I had this poem in the back of my mind:
https://americanliterature.com/author/w ... -of-a-hare
Cheers,
John
Glad you enjoyed the music! As for the bone and how it came to be, I think I had this poem in the back of my mind:
https://americanliterature.com/author/w ... -of-a-hare
Cheers,
John
Well, here we are again, after a little sleep. We continue to enjoy the poem. From the start, the imagery is intriguing, as is N, having 'that art'. We think the bone is descending downstream rather than simply sinking, and find a pleasant echo of 'Row, row, row your boat' (Roud 19236) with 'but a dream' (*v*)
The text on the bone is interesting too, likewise the brief note on its colour. Might you consider, 'I shan't impart'? Perhaps that sounds too English and too 'ar'. We wonder whether S2 L3 might benefit from a little extra magic but are unsure what to suggest at present (*&*)
The entrance of the fishes is unexpected; their actions, remarkable. It's as though a ritual is being described here. Both rhythm 'n' rhyme are well rendered throughout . More idc (^v^)
Cheerie,
F & (^v^)
The text on the bone is interesting too, likewise the brief note on its colour. Might you consider, 'I shan't impart'? Perhaps that sounds too English and too 'ar'. We wonder whether S2 L3 might benefit from a little extra magic but are unsure what to suggest at present (*&*)
The entrance of the fishes is unexpected; their actions, remarkable. It's as though a ritual is being described here. Both rhythm 'n' rhyme are well rendered throughout . More idc (^v^)
Cheerie,
F & (^v^)
Hi John, I enjoyed playing around with the Yeats poem and yours on ChatGPT. Yeats first:
Then yours:This poem, written by W.B. Yeats, reflects a sense of longing and a desire for a different, more carefree existence. The speaker wishes they could set sail on the water, much like many kings and their daughters have done before, and arrive at a picturesque place with beautiful trees, a lawn, music, and dancing. They yearn to learn that the best way to love is to change partners while dancing, emphasizing the fleeting nature of love and relationships.
The second stanza introduces a vivid image of the speaker finding a hare's collar-bone worn thin by the water's erosion. They want to pierce it with a gimlet (a small tool for making holes) and look at the "old bitter world" where people marry in churches. This suggests a contrast between the traditional and perhaps confining nature of marriage (symbolized by churches) and the desire for a more primal, instinctual, or unconventional way of experiencing love and life.
Overall, the poem explores themes of longing for a different, less constrained way of living and loving, one that is more spontaneous and free-spirited. It also hints at a sense of disillusionment with traditional societal norms and conventions.
I've asked my AI student for an essay comparing the two:The poem "Bone" can be interpreted as an exploration of transformation, impermanence, and the interconnectedness of life and nature.
1. **Transformation**: The poem begins with the act of setting a bone upon a stream. This action symbolizes a change or transition. As the bone descends in the stream, it undergoes a metamorphosis, suggesting that life is a continuous process of change and adaptation.
2. **Impermanence**: The poem emphasizes the impermanence of life and objects. The bone, which once had a specific form and function, is now subject to the forces of nature, becoming something different. The phrase "to where the air is but a dream" hints at the ephemeral and dreamlike nature of existence.
3. **Interconnectedness**: The interaction between the bone and the fishes in the stream illustrates the idea of interconnectedness. The fishes "kiss the bone again to life," suggesting a cycle of renewal and rebirth. This highlights the idea that all living beings and elements of nature are connected and dependent on each other.
4. **Ownership and Separation**: The lines "Things are not always as they seem: they are not ours – they stand apart" suggest a reflection on human notions of possession and separation. The poem implies that the bone, once a part of a living being, is no longer "ours" but has become part of the natural world, challenging our sense of ownership and control.
5. **Unity with Nature**: The concluding lines, "It sits upon its rocky bed as if the rocks, not it, were dead," emphasize the unity between the bone and its environment. The bone seems to have transcended its previous state of separation and is now in harmony with the rocks and the stream, blurring the lines between life and non-life.
Overall, "Bone" invites readers to contemplate the fluidity of existence, the transitory nature of objects, and the interconnected web of life in the natural world. It encourages reflection on our relationship with the world around us and the continuous cycle of change and renewal that defines life.
Let's compare the poems "Bone" and "The Collar-Bone Of A Hare" by W.B. Yeats:
**Themes**:
- *Bone*: "Bone" explores themes of transformation, impermanence, and interconnectedness in the context of nature and existence. It reflects on the universal processes of change and renewal.
- *The Collar-Bone Of A Hare*: This poem focuses on themes of the mystical, the supernatural, and the connection between the tangible world and the world of magic. It deals with folklore and the idea of capturing or invoking the mystical through physical objects.
**Imagery**:
- *Bone*: "Bone" uses vivid imagery related to the bone, the stream, and the fishes to create a sensory experience for the reader. It focuses on the transformation of a single object in the natural world.
- *The Collar-Bone Of A Hare*: This poem employs mystical and supernatural imagery, including the idea of the hare's bone as an object of power or enchantment. It delves into the realm of folklore and magical symbolism.
**Structure and Style**:
- *Bone*: This poem is relatively short, concise, and straightforward, with a contemplative and reflective tone. It offers a simple narrative about the transformation of a bone in nature.
- *The Collar-Bone Of A Hare*: This poem is more complex and mysterious in its structure and style. It incorporates elements of Irish folklore and a sense of enchantment. It has a dreamlike quality and explores the mystical aspect of the collar-bone.
**Narrative Perspective**:
- *Bone*: "Bone" has a more observational perspective, with the speaker describing the bone's transformation in a detached manner. It focuses on the natural world.
- *The Collar-Bone Of A Hare*: This poem takes on a more mystical and enchanted perspective, where the speaker is engaged in exploring the magical qualities of the hare's bone and its connection to the supernatural.
**Universal vs. Mystical**:
- *Bone*: "Bone" presents a universal and nature-oriented theme, exploring the broader concept of transformation and interconnectedness in the natural world.
- *The Collar-Bone Of A Hare*: This poem is more mystical and magical in its focus, delving into the world of folklore and the belief in the mystical properties of objects like the hare's bone.
In summary, while both poems by W.B. Yeats touch on themes of transformation and the natural world, they differ significantly in their approach. "Bone" is a concise and nature-focused exploration of change, while "The Collar-Bone Of A Hare" is a more mystical and folklore-infused poem, exploring the enchantment of the tangible world with the supernatural.
Hi Morph,
Well, that is interesting! The only flat-out error I see there is to attribute both poems to Yeats. I'll not dwell on its Yeats commentary, but what it says about my little poem is not silly and has some merit. If I got that commentary from a student in a poetry class, I'd have to say they had not missed the point of the poem, nor its major themes.
There's an AI professor who's been giving his finals to ChatGPT and it averages a solid C. This makes his students happy, they feel they can still outperform AI with the skills they've been given. There was a recent article about it. I would likely give ChatGPT a B or B+, but then, grades do inflate in the humanities.
Cheers,
John
Well, that is interesting! The only flat-out error I see there is to attribute both poems to Yeats. I'll not dwell on its Yeats commentary, but what it says about my little poem is not silly and has some merit. If I got that commentary from a student in a poetry class, I'd have to say they had not missed the point of the poem, nor its major themes.
There's an AI professor who's been giving his finals to ChatGPT and it averages a solid C. This makes his students happy, they feel they can still outperform AI with the skills they've been given. There was a recent article about it. I would likely give ChatGPT a B or B+, but then, grades do inflate in the humanities.
Cheers,
John
Greetings, Fliss and Coo!
It is gratifying to hear the imagery here is intriguing! That’s what I was shooting for. Yes, the N has that art. You are also quite right to hear the round Row, row, row your boat in this.
I think clotted cream is a fair metaphor for a bone’s color – good to hear it works for you! I shan’t impart is a tad too UK even for me, I think – it really doesn’t exist in the US. Or maybe, it’s exactly what I need for more of the weird flavor of the whole. I shall have to think! Perhaps that’s the extra magic you are looking for.
Ah yes, the fishes! Kiss I owe to Phli, with grateful thanks, and it really brings the fish into focus, I feel. Yup, I wanted this to feel like a magic spell, so the feel of ritual is very welcome. I’m glad you liked the music of the piece as well!
Cheerie,
John
It is gratifying to hear the imagery here is intriguing! That’s what I was shooting for. Yes, the N has that art. You are also quite right to hear the round Row, row, row your boat in this.
I think clotted cream is a fair metaphor for a bone’s color – good to hear it works for you! I shan’t impart is a tad too UK even for me, I think – it really doesn’t exist in the US. Or maybe, it’s exactly what I need for more of the weird flavor of the whole. I shall have to think! Perhaps that’s the extra magic you are looking for.
Ah yes, the fishes! Kiss I owe to Phli, with grateful thanks, and it really brings the fish into focus, I feel. Yup, I wanted this to feel like a magic spell, so the feel of ritual is very welcome. I’m glad you liked the music of the piece as well!
Cheerie,
John
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2nd verse is pretty mysterious, well I suppose it all is, but I love the last 6 lines, even though I've just noticed how much "it" there is in it.
I'm out of faith and in my cups
I contemplate such bitter stuff.
I contemplate such bitter stuff.
Greetings, John!
Intriguing indeedy; it's pleasant to shoot and hit. A list of the folk songs is here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_f ... oud_number
Clotted cream is excellent, and tasty too. This evening we feel we've earned a virtual cream tea. Coo offers John a scone, with butter, clotted cream, and strawberry jam. Yes, 'shan't' would add a dash of weirdness, but as usual it all depends on what is the Poetry Plan (^v^)
It's pleasant also to contemplate the kissing fishes. Their actions add reverence, we think (*x*)
Cheerie,
F & (^v^)
Intriguing indeedy; it's pleasant to shoot and hit. A list of the folk songs is here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_f ... oud_number
Clotted cream is excellent, and tasty too. This evening we feel we've earned a virtual cream tea. Coo offers John a scone, with butter, clotted cream, and strawberry jam. Yes, 'shan't' would add a dash of weirdness, but as usual it all depends on what is the Poetry Plan (^v^)
It's pleasant also to contemplate the kissing fishes. Their actions add reverence, we think (*x*)
Cheerie,
F & (^v^)
Greetings, Fliss and Coo,
To whom I extend grateful thanks for the delicious scone. I shall kiss it before eating it, as fishes do. It is a reverent kiss.
Yes, to shoot and hit is a welcome thing in conversation!
Cheerie,
John
To whom I extend grateful thanks for the delicious scone. I shall kiss it before eating it, as fishes do. It is a reverent kiss.
Yes, to shoot and hit is a welcome thing in conversation!
Cheerie,
John