Poetry Forum

Yu see that young lad with ‘is ‘and up ‘is nose,
That’s our Yvonne’s youngest lad, Roy.
An’ av told ‘im ‘is dad were descended from crows,
Yu know… just t’ be kind t’ t’ boy.

That girl int’ corner wi’t’ stain on ‘er skirt,
Roy’s sister; she’s spit of our Mable.
‘Er grandad were pissed an’ ‘e started to squirt,
When she sat on ‘is knee at yon table.

Then there’s our Paul, yu’ll av ‘eard ‘e’s not well,
‘E’s taken t’th’ fellas …yu know!
An’t’ priest’s gone ‘n’ said that ‘e’ll see ‘im in ‘ell,
So Paul’s bin a prayin’ to go!

Remember our Gert, from t’”Insurance ‘n’ Loans”,
She used t’ smoke them fat cigars.
Well, she give up the fags ‘n’ she put on ten stone,
An’ that’ll be ‘er, proppin’ t’ bar.

If Jimmy were ‘ere ‘n’ were lookin’ at these,
‘E’d be sheddin’ a tear wi’ delight.
‘E'd be proud as owd punch, goin’ weak at 'is knees,
T’ see such a beautiful sight.

nice experimentation with dialect, but i think perhaps the subject is a bit stereotypically northern. i'd like to see more of an expectation-breaking twist at the end.

Actually a very bad experimentation with dialect David. The subject may be stereotypical, but true. Im going to my parents house tomorrow to look at my mothers newly gained photo's of her grandparents, great grandparents, cousins and influences. Looking forward to it.

I am full of northern dialect poems, words you've never heard of, english words.

Any road, its your bag.

Thanks guys(I think). Minstrel, could you please explain "very bad experimentation". Hope you didn't take offence at this attempt. As a Northerner, I admire the ability in local people to have a ruddy good laugh at themselves - an ability that seems to be being watered down by a sea of "political correctness". When Marriott Edgar, a Scotsman, wrote about folk from this area, there may have been some who were insulted by his work. I'd like to think though, that the vast majority took it in the spirit that was intended, and "roared" laughing.
If "very bad experimentation" refers to my attempt at writing dialect, perhaps you could offer some tips.

one tip from me would me not to spell you "yu", and to use fewer apostrophes. but the biggest problem for me is its quite a tired topic - maybe hone dialect writing on something more original - what about a dustbin man from bolton talking about picasso?

Mick.

I think the biggest problem with dialect poems is that they dont travel well. I suppose its more of a phonetic problem than anything else. I think dialect can be used more effectively as isolated examples of dialogue in a poem.
I wasn't offended at all, Bongs folk arent known for being sensitive. I just dont think you did a particularly good job here. Having said that, even in the twenty odd miles that seperate us there are some distinct differences in pronunciation. Ah, the good old feudal system.

Heres a dialect poem by a local dialect poet, now dead. I find it hard work but he was well respected as a staunch upholder of tradition.


Tawkin'to gronchilts doll by Jimmy Jones



Ah've bin tawkin'to mi gronchilts doll,

'Twer reyther late yo see,

Ah'd londid whoam past midneet hour,

Ther'were only her un me,

They'd aw gone t'bed us wan ther'wont,

Exceptfer't doll on t'pram,

'Oo stared at me whi "goo-goo " een,

seemed to ask - "wheers they bin Sam "?



Ney mah names Jim, un get thi t'sleep,

Ah hope tha's said thi prayers,

Un do'ant keep starin'like tha does,

Er ah'll shove thi undert'stairs,

Bi this bent deauwn, mi shoon untee,

Seemed gerrum in a knot,

Ah'll swear us t'doll said to itself,

"Yo great big dozy clot".



Ah towd that doll a thing or two,

It wakkent wife i'bed,

Deauwn stairs 'oo cum i'such a peyle,

"What's gooin'on ", 'oo sed,

Ah tried t'explain us best ah could,

Un thowt it wer'a joke,

Then weeshedfer't next ten minutes,

To t'doll ahd never spoke.



"Th'art chewin 't'fat whi gronchilts doll,

Un us asleep i'bed,

Ah've a good mind clout thi whi mi broosh,

Gerrup them stairs", 'oo said.

Ah'll watch next time us ah creep in,

T'be aware o'that,

But road us my luck runs at times,

Ah bet ahfaw o'er tcat.

Alorrer fowk waint know what thet gooinonerbeht - Sno'worra mean?

Albert.

Ah, memories! When I was about 6 years old, living in Australia, an uncle from Garstang came to live with us for a while, and set about tidying the garden for his keep. Whilst he was turning over the sandy soil, he shouted over "Asth' geet any muck?"

Ee lad, well i enjoyed it and it'd goo dahn summat luvelh at our kids poetry club.

Sort of thing children can relate to and enjoy reading outloud without feeling too self-conscious.

Possibly not what you had in mind when writing it Mick but I sometimes think we can be too wrapped up in advancing our art - children need encouragement to 'get into' poetry and this sort of thing attracts their attention (you should see them with 'Boris the Spider'!

tracey

Thanks for that Tracey. I'll keep that in mind for any future writing so that the subject matter and swear words can be kept to acceptable levels.
Mick.