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Cops at a Party
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 11:36 am
by dedalus
Ten-four.
Siren.
Knock down the fuckin door.
Get on the floor, now, now, NOW!!
Gunshot.
Wham-da-blam-da-blam-blam-blam!
OK, what we got here?
Two perpetrators
and three dead kids.
O shit!
Call it in.
Can we throw the kids out in the garden,
say it was an outside deal?
Get real.
So how does it feel,
Detective Inspector?
Feels fine, just pass the wine
you motherfucker.
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 2:56 pm
by J.R.Pearson
Hey Ded another poem of yurs that has wicked good imagery! This is short and killer....i am nt one who usually
promotes swearing in a poem ....but here i happen to know a few cops and lets say they have a certian predispostion to
foul language.
Loved it.
JR
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2007 11:42 am
by dedalus
This one sort of popped out ... it is a bit raw, not my usual style, though I've been criticized for language before. I reckon if the language fits the theme and circumstances, just go ahead and use it. Damn the torpedoes, sort of thing.
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Sat Aug 18, 2007 3:02 pm
by beautifulloser
Hey Ded
Liked it, got some energy to it, I think this is just the use of language which as you say suits the mood. Could see this working well set to the right music, has an eratic nature to it that'd perhaps suit a Pere Ubu song.
Nice one
BL
x
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 9:11 am
by twoleftfeet
Brendan,
Is DI a rank in the American police force?
Geoff
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 4:12 am
by dedalus
No, Geoff, it isn't. But it reads better than Detective Third Grade. Incidentally, have you read the DI Banks series by Peter Robinson? Morse, move over ...
Brendan
Re: Cops at a Party
Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 8:17 am
by twoleftfeet
dedalus wrote: Incidentally, have you read the DI Banks series by Peter Robinson? Morse, move over ...
Brendan
No, but I'll keep an eye out for it.