I'm afraid this cannot be critiqued. It's a flawless read.
cheers.
.
Ray is right, this is a very good poem. Your use of words and imagery make the piece a pleasure to read.
the last two lines in my opinion are just driftwood. We have been given the impression that we are the lap dogs throughout the poem, i do not feel the summory of the last two lines is needed, show and not tell is what i believe is best here.
i could go on about line breaks, but i wouldn't really have much to say except personal opinion, which is the last thing you need!!
Thank you for the poem I really enjoyed it.
the last two lines in my opinion are just driftwood. We have been given the impression that we are the lap dogs throughout the poem, i do not feel the summory of the last two lines is needed, show and not tell is what i believe is best here.
i could go on about line breaks, but i wouldn't really have much to say except personal opinion, which is the last thing you need!!
Thank you for the poem I really enjoyed it.
I think that you don't half spoil your cat!
I won't disagree with the other comments, because it is well written. However, this type of poem isn't my cup of tea (with milk and sugar).
I can only find fault with one word - 'pesky', it just takes the sheen off the rest of the verse. Otherwise, no faults, just not my type.
cheers
I won't disagree with the other comments, because it is well written. However, this type of poem isn't my cup of tea (with milk and sugar).
I can only find fault with one word - 'pesky', it just takes the sheen off the rest of the verse. Otherwise, no faults, just not my type.
cheers
- unchained soul
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Really good poem. Nice to see a cat poem on here. (I love cats). Can't fault it either.
Rach
Rach