To be farsighted
means you see distant crows
but squint at the mail.
To be farsighted
means that you cannot react
but predict quite well.
Light's lines hit your eyes,
bright slingshots aim at your brain
intersect behind.
Closets fill with words:
you study every vein of
Jeremiah's head.
No flattened landscapes,
you look down on round earth
with dilated eyes.
You see cardboard signs
with everything possible,
and envy the blind.
The tile floors concave
when you put on new glasses:
a bowl you can't step out of.
Visions
Last edited by pseud on Tue Jan 17, 2006 6:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Don't treat your common sense like an umbrella. When you come into a room to philosophize, don't leave it outside, but bring it in with you." Wittgenstein
- camus
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Pseud,
The triplet structure looks good on the page, suits the subject.
The first stanza made me laugh. Reminded me of an episode of Father Ted - when Ted was trying to explain to Dougal about perspective - This plastic cow is SMALL those real cows are FAR AWAY, lol.
I agree the last stanza is a cracker.
cheers
Kris
The triplet structure looks good on the page, suits the subject.
The first stanza made me laugh. Reminded me of an episode of Father Ted - when Ted was trying to explain to Dougal about perspective - This plastic cow is SMALL those real cows are FAR AWAY, lol.
I agree the last stanza is a cracker.
cheers
Kris
http://www.closetpoet.co.uk
Thanks for reading and encouragement everyone. Glad to see it well-recieved, and I'll see if I can remedy minor punctuation problems.
lemur -
Jeremiah is/was a biblical prophet, a particularly interesting prophet because he didn't like his predictions, and happened to have a stunning painting named after him showing this dynamic in the 1600s, by Rembrandt van Rijn:
http://bellgardensbaptist.org/guide/lamentations1.jpg
Sometimes it's hard to follow my thought process, but I figured it added a bit of mystery.
- Caleb
lemur -
Jeremiah is/was a biblical prophet, a particularly interesting prophet because he didn't like his predictions, and happened to have a stunning painting named after him showing this dynamic in the 1600s, by Rembrandt van Rijn:
http://bellgardensbaptist.org/guide/lamentations1.jpg
Sometimes it's hard to follow my thought process, but I figured it added a bit of mystery.
- Caleb
"Don't treat your common sense like an umbrella. When you come into a room to philosophize, don't leave it outside, but bring it in with you." Wittgenstein
I've just figured out why a lot of Muslims have the last name 'miah'.
the word isn't dialated it's dilated.
the word isn't dialated it's dilated.
Good catch ray thanks...
been spelling that word incorrectly for years...
been spelling that word incorrectly for years...
"Don't treat your common sense like an umbrella. When you come into a room to philosophize, don't leave it outside, but bring it in with you." Wittgenstein
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Second stanza niggle:
To be farsighted
means that you cannot react
but predict quite well.
How about:
To be farsighted
means not that you can react,
but predict quite well.
A slightly cynical tone, might work better.
Elsewise, good. Not your best, but good.
Cheers,
Keith
To be farsighted
means that you cannot react
but predict quite well.
How about:
To be farsighted
means not that you can react,
but predict quite well.
A slightly cynical tone, might work better.
Elsewise, good. Not your best, but good.
Cheers,
Keith