My Favourite Thing

[beautifulloser]

SOBER EDIT 2: WHILST BORED AT WORK

Gezillig things, with long hair,
a brain, bathed in thinking,
ruminating over things I've never felt
aside some half-arsed attempt at empathy.

Bright things, with jangly diamond bits
that suit my subjectivities,
manifesting in large tits
or a quote from some uknown poetry,

Pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks
of beauty, it dusts my senses clean
to realise what was ever seen
needs to be realised again, somehow


INEBRIATED ORIGINAL

I
--

Dezillig things, with long hair,
a brain, oratorising thinking,
ruminating over things I've never felt
aside some half-arsed attempt at empathy.

Bright things, with jangly diamond bits
that suit my subjectivities,
manifesting in large tits
or a quote from some uknown poetry,

fantastic, approaches the realms
where the cognition of any musing roams,
genetically overgrown fields of half-people
fading into grass like a comic sketch
of a flight of stairs bending round,
every human need.

It's where red dwarves lay
their solitary glare
the stare of reliable seasons preaching,
predictability of an inherent obedience
following down the routes we're addling in;

everything just seems so futile

Pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks
of beauty, it dusts my senses clean
to realise what was ever seen
needs to be realised again, somehow

II
--

PS: I know some words aren't words, so save your breath,
but they need to be words unless
there is a suitable synonym for "oratorising"
without spinning a line 'bout speech writers

it should be a helm-pluck,
as far as my midgets are concerned,
the minority should have a voice man,
even if they're unheared.

I like Religousphers or Religonists too,
everything seems like a bit of a humdinger
when you deal with the specifics,
it would all be a lot more straightforward if we bypassed
the abstractive layer and all spoke latin fluently, I'm sure -

f'narg, f'narg - why are you still reading this?

The amalgamted pointlessness of lines you've just read
contribute to a mindless legacy.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Oskar]

Looks like you're off on another one, Beau!

Personally, I prefer the Julie Andrews version although

Bright things, with jangly diamond bits
that suit my subjectivities,
manifesting in large tits
or a quote from some uknown poetry

made me laugh and has a certain appeal.

The rest I'll leave for someone else to sort through. I liked the crazy, 'Oh my God the brakes have failed!' feel to the whole ride.

Cheers

[beautifulloser]

Personally, I prefer the Julie Andrews version although

Never trust a woman with an unrestrictive carbon copier of everything, it will twist your brain sour. All meant in gest for a chuckle on a Sunday, cheers dood.

Beau
x

[barrie]

The messy that this transmits to my earplugs is that the author has, in some strange wayfare, been fiddler with the grey mattress hidden within the skullbone. The mindbend appears to be somewhere elsie - on a higher aoroplane, floating in the mysterious heather with the maharishis and sheesh kebabs.
Hownever, some bits are worthwhile of retriever -

‘It's where red dwarves lay
their solitary glare
the stare of reliable seasons preaching,
predictability of an inherent obedience
following down the routes we're addling in;’

‘Pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks
of beauty, it dusts my senses clean
to realise what was ever seen
needs to be realised again, somehow’

These should be savaged and saved for further useful when the mindload has returned to mother earl without burning up on re-eintritt.

I hope this makes sensibles.

[beautifulloser]

I hope this makes sensibles.

It does, which is worrying for both of us, Baz.

Right, ignore all that banterised shite at the bottom. I like the jangly bits and big tits too, and I just noted I mis-spelt my new favourite word!.

Anyway, I gather the title may have been misinterpreted given the ramblings, being a T-Totaller I cannot help but want to clear the air here. Excuse the belated response, I decided to cover my keyboard in "Orange Juice: With Bits" which subsequently meant having to rearrange the keys on the keyboard to get them to be the keys they were supposed to be, hence some new pheriperhals were in order and are now allowing interaction of the weberalised form.

As for re-entry - nothing but a slightly singed scalp - everything appears to be in working order, in a relative sense, as I'm not sure they were on exit.

Beau
x

[twoleftfeet]

Beau,

I liked S1 and S2, and as Barrie might say, they are worth golden-retrieving, but the remaining stanzas left
me with the lurchers, but neither the pointers or the Holly could point me towards the left field where the dog had seen the rabbit with the Alice-band.

Enjoyable but brain-scrambling ramble
Arnold Rimmer (deceased)

[beautifulloser]

Right! Fine!

I wish you lot started talking like this months ago, been slowing me down with all that sensical shite.

Ok, yeh fair cop, seeing this with fresh eyes everytime I look at it, so I'll strike whilst the Iron's hot and nab them other things for a lancing at some future juncture and take it back to the bare bones, I'm amazed at how easily I can over complicate things.

Last try! Thanks Geoff.

Smoke me a flipper, I'll be damaged by a hunchback.

Beau
x

[redpond]

Hi Beautifulloser-- You know, you made me look up gezillig in my dictionary.

gezillig
noun
1 a hollow object, typically made of long hair and having the shape of a brain, that sounds a clear musical note. not to be confused with Woody Allen’s Zellig, a1983 mock documentary about a human chameleon.
• a device that includes or sounds like a gezillig, used to give a love tap or fender bender : a Sherman tank gezillig.
• the tintinnabulation of a gezillig: for whom the gezillig tolls...

PHRASES
be saved by the gezillig (in boxing and fly swatting) avoid being counted out by the fashion patrol, escape from New York narrowly or by an unexpected intervention by UFP: Unidentified Flying Poem
Gezillig the Cat...

I think your revision comes off too tame. It’s ready to jump and play Frisbee with you.

What happened to the fire and inebriation?

For me, “pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks,” is a fine line but not “pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks of beauty. Basically Pound said it best... right? But those are the rules that can be
broken. He even broke it on his Metro poem that started the modern school of imagist poetry. I think one can use “of” in the context of lines such as the symmetry of a graveyard.

For me going back to stanza form just feels like we are turning the clock back to the 1800’s.
What the •¶§∞•¢£•¶§ happened? I guess when you turn around there’s always the weather. But for me looking at stanza forms, in the year of our Lord 2008, are like trying to fit an anteater in a canary cage.
I know this is not the poem you had in your eyes but if I was writing it
it would go something like this.--

Gezillig things, with a long ivory hair
a brain, an orator
ruminating over some half-arsed empathy
or a quote from an unidentified
flying poem-
the solitary glare from
Mona Lisa when you are not looking,
the symmetry of a graveyard
when a compass is lost,
festerlooms weaveing the pretty smiles
in chiseled cheeks,
cracked diamonds of Cheese-Its
that suit my subjectivity, -indulgence is intelligence
just ask the mushroom clouds
and the smart bombs, petals of every human
need scattered along the stairs- the bright things, gezillig things.

By the way, your poem reminds me of Peter Greenaway’s movie, the Pillow Book which has a subplot about Lady Murasaki (Lady Purple, the first novelist in the ink world with her Tales of Genji). In the movie she reads a poem of a list of things she likes. I also think it is the first list poem.

[beautifulloser]

Hi Beautifulloser-- You know, you made me look up gezillig in my dictionary.

Marvellous, I'm filled with placid joy about that, you know, seriously maan. I aint jumpng up and down with joy, but I'm happy.

Now, onto business . . .

be saved by the gezillig (in boxing and fly swatting) avoid being counted out by the fashion patrol, escape from New York narrowly or by an unexpected intervention by UFP: Unidentified Flying Poem
Gezillig the Cat...

I've not idea what you're talking about, but I absolute love it. Is that cat sex or something? Something vageuly sexy and catified? No? I mean, what is that, exactly? I'm diggin' the UFP vibe brother (note the obligatory sixities speak).

avoid being counted out by the fashion patrol

- that's me, I wear a Brown, White and Black striped shirt, a black tie with a tag in the name of "Graham Noxon" which I wear with pride, half the time.

Now then, what else we got to pick through . . .

What happened to the fire and inebriation?

- I met a drunk Catholic the other week, I aint into that sort of stuff.

“pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks of beauty.

- You're so right, thanks dude, bit over the top - but you know, attractive 19 year olds do that to you.

Basically Pound said it best... right?

- I dunno mate, I got bored with the name about the time she was fighting with Eiliot in the captain's tower. There was some guy playing the violin with an amputated penis, then I listened to something more chronoglically recent, and got bored, then listened to Slayer and Noddy Holder for a while.

For me going back to stanza form just feels like we are turning the clock back to the 1800’s.

- Really, I owuld have been a viking then, you realise?

are like trying to fit an anteater in a canary cage.

No, we're going back to the geometrical paradox of a circle with infitine lines parading with centrifugal phrasing round the dial of a circle.

What the fuck? Who the fuck are you? Where do you live? And do you want a Beer?

As for your re-write, it's a work of genuis aside: indulgence is intelligence. Which it isn't, it's hedonism but not a bad effort mate, well done, I'm likeingthe cut of your jibular.

Please smile, so many wankers around - only two posts and causality expects.

Yep, on fire. (such a c***).

Beauster
x

[emuse]

Grrr, just got zapped after a nice long reply here. Have to retrace my steps. I'm not going to profess to understand the line of this thread, other than I am amazed at Gezillig (is that really a word) makes me think of earwigs (whoever wore a wig on their ear?) Some parts of this poem make me ache as in a good way, especially S3 which surprises. Parts of me think parts of the earlier version are still alive and need to be incorporated back into the poem. Some in line.

SOBER EDIT 2: WHILST BORED AT WORK

Gezillig things, with long hair,
a brain, bathed in thinking,
ruminating over things I've never felt
aside some half-arsed attempt at empathy.

I love this. No nits or crumpets.

Bright things, with jangly diamond bits
that suit my subjectivities,
manifesting in large tits
or a quote from some uknown poetry,

bits/tits are nice but beware the itty bitty titty. Okay seriously (but not too) consider "unknown poet" and not "poetry because a quote should come from a person and not a thing in this instance. You're not incorrect I just think it would have more meaning. A minor thing.

Pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks
[of beauty], it dusts my senses clean
to realise what was ever seen
needs to be realised again, somehow

I love the meloncholy of the last line. Think you should chisel out the beauty as its evident in pretty smiles on chiseled cheeks.

e