Oil & Bones (moved)

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dedalus
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Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:32 am

Removed to the Competitition forum ... where it should have been all along! :roll:
Last edited by dedalus on Wed Apr 30, 2008 8:05 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Gene van Troyer
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Sat Apr 26, 2008 3:03 am

How funny. I could not help but think "Y' what?" stood out a bit awkwardly, unrhymed among all the other lines. Also, the end became rather burdened by rhymes with "bones," which left me with a feeling that you were running out of momentum.

Those last seven lines, though, were priceless with that play of "tenor" and "fiver."
"If you don't like my principles, I have others." —Groucho Marx
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