Fits and Jerks

[ray miller]

He's ill at ease with talking therapies
and is happier to take
those good old-fashioned remedies,
you can hear his body shake
during ECT as he taps his feet
to the sound of synthesisers;
it's a retro beat down memory street
and it really gets inside us.

Though there isn't any evidence it works,
have faith and you'll be saved by fits and jerks.

He's on an odyssey from moral agency,
prepared to die a thousand deaths.
He's getting free electricity
but he'll find himself in debt.

With each treatment there's a bit more disappears,
the minutes turn to days which turn to years,
he has more space than before between his ears
and he forgets.

Don't imagine these involuntary spasms
are of the kind associated with orgasms
and the chasms
that appear to make you sweat
are yawning yet.



original last verse
These involuntary spasms
bear no relation to orgasms
and the chasms that appear to make you sweat
are yawning yet.

[barrie]

Electroconvulsive therapy, it just used to be called electric shock treatment.

Good use of end and internal rhymes - the first verse is a cracker.

With each treatment there's a bit more disappears,
the minutes turn to days which turn to years,
he has more space than before between his ears
and he forgets. - I think you could lose there's in L1, and which in L2.

With each treatment a bit more disappears,
the minutes turn to days, turn to years,

The last verse is quite weak in comparison with the rest and could be dropped -

he has more space than before between his ears
and he forgets. - This sounds like a good strong finish to my ears. Then again, I'm getting on a bit...etc

Good one

Barrie

[Sulpicia]

This is dead cool.
Will come back with more detailed thoughts, but just wanted to say how much I enjoyed it.
cheers
Helen

[R. Broath]

Yes indeed. Good stuff, Ray. The mechanical versus the chemical. A brutal choice but you have presented it in a very humane way.
'The chasms that appear to make you sweat' very good use of 'appear' as in real/unreal.

I assisted at some of these in the 1970s while training as a nurse (only lasted a year) and was struck by the remarkable change in those who received this treatment. Temporary though, and as you say 'a bit more disappears.'
Good, perceptive read.

Jimmy

[ray miller]

Oh God, what do I know? I hate this poem, I had so much trouble with it and it has been butchered and torn apart from its original design and length.I actually came back to delete it and start again only to find Barrie and Sulpicia seemed to like it! Never trust the artist, trust the tale as D.H.Lawrence said. I've revised the last verse, I can see that it was weak but I like "are yawning yet". As for ECT what little research has been published shows that its efficacy is no better(sometimes worse) than placebo. I believe that any benefit that ensues can be attributed to the ceremony attendant to the treatment. Thanks for your comments Ray

[twoleftfeet]

Ray,

I laughed at the half-rhyme of "synthesisers"/"inside us", but I'm not sure whether I'm meant to - it's unclear
whether you are being critical of the guy for chosing the treatment.

Are they still doing it?
Having read Zen and the Art.. (Pirsig had a lobotomy) such butcheries fill me with fear and loathing.

Good read
Geoff

[David]

A good read indeed. We don't still do this, do we?

I always associate it with One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

You could almost leave it at this, you know:

He's ill at ease with talking therapies
and is happier to take
those good old-fashioned remedies,
you can hear his body shake
during ECT as he taps his feet
to the sound of synthesisers;
it's a retro beat down memory street
and it really gets inside us.

Though there isn't any evidence it works,
have faith and you'll be saved by fits and jerks.

Cheers

David

[ray miller]

Geoff/David, we do indeed still "do it".It depends more on your postcode these days. 25 years ago I was nearly thrown out of my nurse training for refusing to participate in administering ECT against someone's will. I've managed to avoid being anywhere near it since then but it loomed on the horizon again recently and is one of the reasons I'm getting out of the game. In this area it's given in The ECT Suite, which is a nice touch, don't you think? It's not the barbarism I object to. If you take the view that psychological problems are rooted in bio-physical "deficiences" then it's no more barbaric than heart surgery - and that is the stance of Psychiatry. The assumption that such problems can and ought to be managed by an electric current is what I can't stomach. What does it say about that person? Thanks all, Ray