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This is a serious poetry forum not a "love-in". Post here for more detailed, constructive criticism.
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unchained soul
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Tue Oct 11, 2005 8:14 am

Juices drip down her slender fingers and a smile forms.
Swollen rose hued lips of silky soft skin open in invitation,
as her hand, exploring still further finds her ultimate pleasure.

Sensations gently dance to the rhythm her hand began.
Tiptoeing smoothly through delicate flesh, increasing in intensity.
Willingly obeying instruction; revelling in every moment.

Performance building in eager anticipation,
until at last no instruction required steps flow instinctively;
augmenting to the cascading crescendo of the final pulse.
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BlueForAQuarter
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Tue Oct 11, 2005 1:16 pm

Not bad I guess, but the imagery feels kinda "been there done that."
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unchained soul
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Tue Oct 11, 2005 1:24 pm

Hi Blue,

Thanks.

Rach :D
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