Poetry Forum

(revision)

Computable numbers

One

Turing machine is how we remember
your name, a device which might --
given enough paper tape --
calculate anything,

except the mechanism cannot reach.
Not everything is computable, a point
you wanted made. Sometimes
there's no route from where you start
to the number you desire.

Two

Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where machines, tapping on keyboards,
apply to join the human race.

Did you suspect you'd made a faith
when you invented this scrap
of applied philosophy? Some people need,
and passionately believe, that one day
the test will be passed.
They will look at a machine,
to see it looking back.

Did you imagine
your machines might be free --
as if paper tape could really be infinite --
and permit attachment
to whatever device
took their fancy:
dancing with lawnmowers by moonlight
or taking a chance
on an upright pillar-drill?

Pi

Code-breaker Turing is how we remember
you -- genius applied to a problem
of ideology, ice-cold salt water, and steel.
How did it begin?

Maybe in a smoke-filled room,
a serious man with a pipe explained:
All we (puff) need
is a new branch of mathematics,
(puff) a new kind of engineering,
a love for doing crosswords in German,
and total (puff-puff) secrecy.

I like to think you hesitated
for only a second,
before rolling up your sleeves.

Infinity

Dear, dead Alan, if you had seen
all these future machines,
their imaginary rooms
where you can go to meet
even a pillar-drill. Perhaps
you could jot down suitable numbers
Perhaps you wouldn't need
the apple.

--

Computable numbers

One

Turing machine is how we remember
your name, a device which might --
if given enough paper tape --
calculate anything,

except the mechanism cannot reach,
not everything is computable, a point
you wanted made. Sometimes
no route exists from where you are
to get the number you desire.

Two

Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where a new machine sits at a console,
and applies for admittance
to the human race.

Did you suspect you'd made a faith
when you invented this scrap
of applied philosophy? Some people need,
and passionately believe, that one day
the test will be passed.
They will look at a machine,
to see it looking back.

Did you imagine
your machines might be free --
as if paper tape could really be infinite --
and permit love
for whatever device
took their fancy:
dancing with lawnmowers by moonlight
or taking a chance
on an upright pillar-drill?

Pi

Code-breaker Turing is how we remember
you -- genius applied to a problem
of ideology, ice-cold salt water, and steel.
How did it begin?

Maybe in a smoke-filled room,
a serious man with a pipe explained:
All we (puff) need
is a new branch of mathematics,
(puff) a new kind of engineering,
a love for doing crosswords in German,
and total (puff-puff) secrecy.

I like to think you hesitated
for a split second,
then rolled up your sleeves.

Infinity

Dear, dead Alan, if you had seen
all these future machines,
their imaginary rooms
where you can go to meet
even a pillar-drill. Perhaps
you could decipher some suitable number,
and maybe not need
that apple.

--

A long poem, more than a little inspired by Oskar's short-poem competition entry...

Much enjoyed, Ian.

I think #2 is my favourite:
Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where a new machine sits at a console,
and applies for admittance
to the human race.

I like how you have used the word "free".
(Sadly, I didn't even know what a pillar-drill was: Google informs me that they are programmable - but I expect you knew that.)
Love seemed an odd choice of word when, on the surface at least, you are talking about machines. Perhaps "attachment" ?

The progression - 1,2, π, Infinity - is ingenious.

Lastly "Infinity" isn't quite working for me -
Is "number" a metaphor for a partner?
If so that is an interesting ploy but ,for me, "decipher" doesn't support the metaphor.
Also "Dear DEAD Alan" is a bit "telly" if not bizarre. I think "Dear Alan" would be fine.

Geoff

Ian

I enjoyed the read without necessarily understanding all of it. Yes, quite a long(ish) poem, but it held my interest right the way through. I also liked the way each section is set out as if part of a mathematical progression. Seeing Pi again brought me out in a cold sweat!

The highlights for me were -

dancing with lawnmowers by moonlight
or taking a chance
on an upright pillar-drill?

That's completely mad and made me laugh. I also really enjoyed the Wing Commander Kite character puffing away on his pipe.

... in a smoke-filled room,
a serious man with a pipe explained:
All we (puff) need
is a new branch of mathematics,
(puff) a new kind of engineering,
a love for doing crosswords in German,
and total (puff-puff) secrecy.

Trademark bodkin.

I'd like to know what you mean by -

genius applied to a problem
of ideology, ice-cold salt water, and steel.

Is that an oblique reference to a German U-boat?
Your affection for the man is quite apparent, I think, in that last Infinity section. I like the use of Dear, dead Alan. I read that as a lament for a victim of the social mores and archaic laws of the day.
Turing, and all of the other code-breakers at Bletchley Park, proved that you don't have to possess the 'heroic' qualities of an Audie Murphy (now there's fertile ground for a poem!) to serve your country during a war.

There's nothing here to help you polish it up I'm afraid, I just wanted to register my thumbs up.

Regards

Bodkin,

I am going to slight waver in my usual appreciation of your work. The problem for me is - and that doesn't mean it is a problem - is there is more prose than poetry. Some of the lines just don't add up to a poem but simply a line split in two - i.e.
and applies for admittance
to the human race.

That said where you have split a line of thought you have chosen the right place and cleverly mingled with the poetry.

This is a real education as those amazing men and their machines are owed a great deal and easily forgotten in their secret back rooms and if it makes anyone rush to their search engine then you have succeeded where history lessons fail.

Oskar wrote:
I'd like to know what you mean by -

genius applied to a problem
of ideology, ice-cold salt water, and steel.

Is that an oblique reference to a German U-boat?

FWIW I took it to be a reference to the U-Boats AND the convoy ships/escorts i.e. the "Battle of the Atlantic".
When the Bletchley Park codebreakers were able to decode intercepted U-Boat messages in time the convoys were able to
be directed around the U-boats.

twoleftfeet wrote:Much enjoyed, Ian.

I think #2 is my favourite:
Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where a new machine sits at a console,
and applies for admittance
to the human race.

I like how you have used the word "free".
(Sadly, I didn't even know what a pillar-drill was: Google informs me that they are programmable - but I expect you knew that.)
Love seemed an odd choice of word when, on the surface at least, you are talking about machines. Perhaps "attachment" ?

The progression - 1,2, π, Infinity - is ingenious.

Lastly "Infinity" isn't quite working for me -
Is "number" a metaphor for a partner?
If so that is an interesting ploy but ,for me, "decipher" doesn't support the metaphor.
Also "Dear DEAD Alan" is a bit "telly" if not bizarre. I think "Dear Alan" would be fine.

Geoff

Hi Geoff,

I hadn't realised that pillar-drills are programmable nowadays. I was just looking for a sufficiently masculine piece of equipment.

But I'm really chuffed you pointed this out as it fits really well.

"Attachment" would work really nicely, I think I will take you up on that one...

--

In "infinity" I was trying to play on the numbers from "one" and the title, and the idea of getting somebody's phone number.

I did struggle with that word "decipher" and I picked that one in the end as a reference back to the previous section.

Possibly just some basic word like "get" would be better, I will think on it...

"Dear, dead Alan" seemed right to me, as I was trying to draw a line under the sections about his life in the past and bring us right forward to the present and his death...

Originally it was the "Dear" I did not have...

I could make some sort of play on undecidability and the algorithm termination problem as an expression of Gödel's incompleteness theorem, which is what the Turing machines were about...

but I think I'll lose 90% of the audience...

Thanks,

Ian

Oskar wrote:I'd like to know what you mean by -

genius applied to a problem
of ideology, ice-cold salt water, and steel.

Is that an oblique reference to a German U-boat?
Your affection for the man is quite apparent, I think, in that last Infinity section. I like the use of Dear, dead Alan. I read that as a lament for a victim of the social mores and archaic laws of the day.
Turing, and all of the other code-breakers at Bletchley Park, proved that you don't have to possess the 'heroic' qualities of an Audie Murphy (now there's fertile ground for a poem!) to serve your country during a war.

As Geoff said, I was referring to the fact that a lot of the decryption was related to shipping movements. u-boat positions and air attacks on shipping.

There's nothing here to help you polish it up I'm afraid, I just wanted to register my thumbs up.

Regards

No problem, it's great just to hear you enjoyed it.

Thanks,

Ian

Hi Clara,

I see what you mean about some sections being prosy... but it may just be that sort of subject matter.

I will give it some thought, however...

I could probably just do "and applies to join the human race" for that particular example.

Thanks,

Ian

Hi all,

I've made a revision, mainly tweaking the language in various places.

See what you think,

Thanks,

Ian

Bodkin, wonderful poem! Pi is my favorite & the most expressive. Pull in German crossword puzzles in any poem & I am on board. Just a thumbs up for the reviz. Won-der-fan-tas-tic-u-acular..


JR

J.R.Pearson wrote:Pull in German crossword puzzles in any poem & I am on board

You may have to wait a while for your next thrill, I reckon...

IMHO a definite improvement, Ian.

Gosh, thanks JR!

--

Thanks Geoff, good to know I'm on the right track.

--

OTOH, I keep reading this bit:

[/u]Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where machines sat at consoles
apply to join the human race.

and the "sat" keeps coming across as a simple past-tense instead of... when I guess it is colloquial for "sitting"...

actually "sitting" will read as well, I'm going to change it.

Thanks,

Ian

bodkin wrote:Gosh, thanks JR!

--

Thanks Geoff, good to know I'm on the right track.

--

OTOH, I keep reading this bit:

[/u]Turing test is how we remember
your name, a sort of exam
where machines sat at consoles
apply to join the human race.

and the "sat" keeps coming across as a simple past-tense instead of... when I guess it is colloquial for "sitting"...

actually "sitting" will read as well, I'm going to change it.

Thanks,
Ian

FWIW I think "sitting" chops the rhythm: it just needs some punctuation -
"machines, sat at consoles,"
-Simples

Ah great! Yes, I'll do that.

Didn't want to let this one slip away. I think it's excellent. My only quibbles are that I still find "sat" awkward, and I didn't understand (or much like) "the apple". Otherwise, truly excellent.

Cheers

David

David wrote:Didn't want to let this one slip away. I think it's excellent. My only quibbles are that I still find "sat" awkward, and I didn't understand (or much like) "the apple". Otherwise, truly excellent.

Cheers

David

"seated" then? or something more tangential, such as "tapping at", "working at"..?

The apple is a reference to the way he died, from a cyanide-coated apple...

it's commonly imagined, but not actually provable that it was suicide. It is theorised he deliberately blurred the appearance of events (he had been working with cyanide) to allow his mother to believe it was an accident.

Ian

bodkin wrote:The apple is a reference to the way he died, from a cyanide-coated apple...

Sorry, I didn't know that. (Thicko!) I withdraw my objection.

OK, S3, L3, Take 27...