Poetry Forum

The Storm

"certain airs, detached from the body of the wind . . . crept round corners and ventured indoors"
------------------------------------------------------------------- Virginia Woolf, To the Lighthouse

Nothing stirred until the typhoon struck
the gable end, and the wind and rain,
duly spiked, split ranks, dispersed
in certain solitary airs, here and there,
some behind the fascia boards, under eaves,
yet more sliding down the concrete cladding
and finding passage past the metal shutters,
boxed and sleeping sentry guards
with passive, sodden, corrugated faces.
And so such damage was done:

those airs coerced the brads from boards
and bolts from purlins, slid wet hands along
the papered walls, not blind and feeling
for the switch, but seeking out the curl
and lip of neglect; some airs in darker tones
refused to merely mount the stairs to link
hands with those skipping through
the roof space, ruffling the fiberglass, no
those violent airs preferred to pull
the rug from underneath the house,
collapse the stairs, slam them closed
like accordions on a winter Paris pavement.
How they whooped and howled, those upper airs,
suddenly accountable to gravity.

[And howl too did the master of the house,
sliding a hand across a sodden mattress,
stretching his arms towards an absent spouse
now drowning on the freshly planted lawn.]













~

Some of you will recognise this. Yesterday I posted three poems inspired by the Woolf novel. Posting them together was an error in judgement as each poem should stand alone. Contrary to charges of being"exclusive" (which I could completely understand) my reason for posting them together was in fact out of respect for those readers who are familiar with the book; I felt I needed to explicitly acknowledge the inspiration, but of course the poems should be open to all readers, regardless of whether they know the book.

Thank you to all of you who commented before. I have saved your comments for my own reference. I'll post the three poems individually over the next few days, each with its own epigraph anchoring it to the novel. I'd appreciate them being treated as stand-alone pieces.

By the by, apologies if I am a little remiss with comments at the moment. I broke my ankle playing football at the weekend and spending too much time at my desk causes me much discomfort. I'll try to catch up when I am mended . . .

B.

Brian I read and commented on this yesterday - missed the reference to the book and thought this was reference to a painting. Unfortunately I haven't read this book (!) will have to see if I can - and it is difficult to take a novel, and then write a poem about it as of course those who have read it will have the original in mind and a poem can seem 'unnecessary'? But for me fortunately, I haven't read it so could just enjoy the poems which I did. I was impressed by the writing, and the seemless movement of words apart from a couple of likes, but I think you will have that from yesterday.

Makes it easy for the reader to have them separate to comment on. For me this one has the best writing and ending. But the others were very good so this must be exceptional? I am sure some purists will say it is more prose than poetry but for once I don't care. CB

p.s. sorry to hear about your accident. Ouch. Hope that damaged limb is soon mended.

And howl too did the master of the house,
sliding a hand across a sodden mattress,
stretching his arms towards an absent spouse...[tab][/tab][tab][/tab]Although I think it should be a singular arm as it is only one hand...

3/4 of a killer last stanza - But I don't get the drowning on the lawn bit; if it is a reference to a book, it won't work for those who, like me, haven't read the book.

I picked this out because it hit me right on the envy bone.

Fabulous.

Definitely a good move to post the poems separately. This is great stuff. The rhythm is terrific, and that's the first thing that always strikes me about a poem. I'll come back and read again shortly to pick up more nuances.

Excellent.

Was only not keen on a couple of line breaks:

refused to merely mount the stairs to link
hands with those skipping through

the roof space, ruffling the fiberglass, no
those violent airs preferred to pull

not keen on breaking on link and def not on 'no'. In fact I'm not so keen on the 'no' at all.

Just an opinion, of course! Very accomplished. Hope the leg heals soon.

Ros

Thanks all. Very glad to hear this is hitting home for so many of you.

B.

Really good, Bri - an exciting and rewarding read. All I could do is accumulate the following more or less piffling observations.

Somehow the typhoon immediately evokes Conrad rather than Woolf. Is there a less loaded word, or is it hers?

Interesting that you feel the need to insert "solitary" into VW's own phrase.

Could you omit lines 8-9 of S1? They just seem to hold things up slightly to me.

Brad's an interesting word, as is purlin. Had to google them both.

S3 is great, but is it one where a knowledge of the book is really essential?

The rest is admiration. Looking forward to the rest.

Cheers

David

So the storm actually hauled his wife outside and drowned her? That's one heck of a wind!

Thanks David. You might be right about omitting those lines you've flagged, but I am quite smitten with them . . . not always a good thing, I know!
Of course, as I stated when I posted these as a series before, I don't think a knowledge of the book is really essential. Those who are familiar might find more to think on, but it really shouldn't be an issue. At least, that is the hope . . .

Your words always important David, thanks.

B.