Poetry Forum

The triggers burn hot at the It-Ain't-OK-Corral
The sons of slaves are insane

Kamikaze religions thicken the plot
Young people go kill in their name

BANG BANG! Another sad case of mania in public
Now an innocent child has got a bag for a stomach

You hate me and I hate you
He screams paki so you shout jew

Just what is this world coming to
When boy kills boy on the word of his crew

Lovers tears
A mother without a son
Brother' fears
The way of the gun

PEACE>LOVE>UNITY

Hi ASBO1,

I really liked that poem. Very poignant. Well done.

Rach

This poem made me think and i felt thoughtless. You have written about something most know nothing about. Well done. Keep on writing more, the page is empty without you.

Ummmkay.

Reaching a bit but what the hell.

ASBO1,

I liked this. I haven't liked anything else of yours so far. Good work.


Cheers,

Bombadil

As usual, I disagree with Bombadil. I think most of your stuff is pretty sharp and rhythmic, but apart from the first four lines this is just a list of lame slogans and cliches. The worst is "just what is this world coming to", which I can read every day in the letters page of my local rag if I want. But I like "the sons of slaves are insane" and the "kamikaze religions", and based on your other stuff you've got a great ear and a sense of humour. So there you go.

Quelle choque!

Somebody disagreed with me.

kj,

Fuck-near everyone disagrees with me. Its a "don't mind him he's just the token American nut-case" sort of thing.

Cheers,

Bombadil

Yeh, 'wot is this world coming to' is a wee bit lame innit.
Must Try Harder.