Poetry Forum

Turn your back on the sun and
your shadow shall lead you
to places of darkness.

Face the light
and leave the denizens of evil to their own.

And should your shadow choose to stay behind,
'tis better that you seek more loyal kind.

Hi Wally.
I have asked this question before in connection with an earlier poem posted by you.
When is the narrator here supposed to be speaking? "Tis better" (unless there is some special regional or South African setting I do not know about...as there may be) is an expression faded from use. Is there a special reason why it is being used in this context? Any contemporary reader British reader will immediately think...why Ye Olde?
Cheers,
Ant.

I like the idea expressed in the first 3 lines, shadow leading to darkness. After that it didn't seem to go anywhere much. The end lines remind me only of Peter Pan and I don't think that's your intent. Should it be denizen's?

Hello Ant

Thank you for those observations. In the case of SEED O' FLAME, you were quite correct, the language did not suit the chosen voice and I corrected it. (go take look)

In this case, the voice defiantly emanates from an "old soul". Who he is exactly and where or when he comes from, I don't yet know but I suspect he will turn out to be a religious figure due to message he conveys. So, until he reveals more of himself to me, I will permit him the use of "olde tongue"

Cheers

Wally

Righto Wally, if the setting requires old voice..just checking.

Light/shadows metaphors are always interesting...although the last line reminds me a little of some horror story. Is it vampires that do not have shadows? I forget.

Cheers,
Ant.

ray miller wrote: Should it be denizen's?

Given the "their", I guess it should be denizens'

cheers
peter

Ray and Peter
Thanks for picking up on that glitch. It was an omision

and leave the denizens of evil to their own.

Wally