Fabrication - Revised

[unchained soul]

Nesting birds pick up pieces of life from the damp ground; meticulously matching, scratching for useful material.
Tightly mud-packing to compact, keep intact; everything that keeps you happy,secure,
up with the Jones'next door. Eager to make it look pretty; normal: pretty normal.

Outwardly imitating everyone's outlook, though hiding a complex mismatched heart
interwoven with the dark threads of boring hobbies,shunned thoughts:all sorts.
resembling a ramshackle shed instead of the accepted mansion.

[hello]

quite liked this one. r u just settling for that prose poetry thing? I don't know any poetry lexicon to explain why I liked it so I aint much help.
I like the imagery, very 'domestic desperation' and a sort of sad resignation to the monotony of it all. Ease up on the allitertion though.

[unchained soul]

Hi Hello,

Thanks. Im glad you liked it. Not sure what I was going for really. lol. I agree about the alliteration. I got a bit carried away.

Rach