David in Ink Sweat and Tears

The world outside PG
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Macavity
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Mon Sep 11, 2023 5:30 pm

jisbell00
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Mon Sep 11, 2023 7:12 pm

Lovely, David - well done! I especially like "the kingdom of the corner of the eye."

Cheers,
John
ray miller
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Mon Sep 11, 2023 8:30 pm

the kingdom of the corner of the eye.

Yer've still got it, mate.
I'm out of faith and in my cups
I contemplate such bitter stuff.
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CalebPerry
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Tue Sep 12, 2023 4:21 am

That's a very good poem, David. "Kingdom of the corner of the eye" is an interesting way to describe those things we think we see, but then disappear when we look right at them.
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If you don't like the black theme, it is easy to switch to a lighter color. Just ask me how.
If I don't critique your poem, it is probably because I don't understand it.
David
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Thu Sep 14, 2023 6:37 pm

Ah, thank ye kindly, Phil. Nice of you to share this. I had forgotten the collegiality here. (It's less well-developed than it used to be, I think, but there are still traces of it.)

Thanks John.
ray miller wrote:
Mon Sep 11, 2023 8:30 pm
the kingdom of the corner of the eye.

Yer've still got it, mate.
Thanks Ray. This is quite an old one now, so it's probably more accurate to say that, at that time, I still had it. Or, more accurately - and this applies to all of us - I do still have it, but intermittently. It comes and goes, don't it?

And thanks to you too, Caleb. Sorry, I missed your comment the first time around.

Cheers

David
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Fri Sep 15, 2023 4:35 pm

Congratulation David,

I may have seen this one out of the corner of my eye in the summer and critiqued it. I'm glad it's been spotted by a quality publication too. I didn't imagine that it was a good poem after all. :)
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Fri Sep 15, 2023 4:38 pm

Thanks Morph!

David
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