Thoughts On Us (intro)

[thefallofRome]

.



An Introduction


[tab][/tab]It seems that writers like to write about writers. I’m not sure as to why that is. Perhaps the reason is embedded in the human propensity towards selfishness; we desire to tell of ourselves, to make others feel what we feel—maybe every writer is just talking about himself or herself. Perhaps it is because it is rare that an author has the ingenuity and the courage to create characters that are too detached from their own identities. Perhaps it is simply the easiest way to express what they so desire to cry out. A writer, or even a character with an affinity for literature, is familiar to them—some of the cerebral processes and the management of emotions. There is a convenient reference point.
[tab][/tab]I have to say that it won’t be very easy for me. I personally don’t consider myself much of a writer, regardless of what others say. I do like to read; however this is not only about me. I am only writing because he asked me to. He wanted me to write about us because I was the most precious thing that ever happened to him, to breathe life into us because he felt that no matter what my own ability with words was, I was the only one who could make us into what we really were. He was the writer. He loved me and therefore I was half of him and he was all of me. I don’t think I can do him justice and I don’t think that we will be understood even after this is read. He asked me, though, and I couldn’t say no. He put a letter in my hand, held my wrists with cold fingers and made me promise to put a pen to paper, to somehow explain. He told me,
[tab][/tab]Jen, I want you to write. You always read my words and listened, letting what I wrote become a part of you but I need you to find it in yourself to write. That way there will always be something that connects me to you. That way there will always be something to keep me in your blood.

[tab][/tab]We were not perfect. I angered too easily, we did not end up together, and he could not let go of that dangerous shade of loving life. He kept poetry under his arm, swaggered and ran, drank too much coffee and was too bright for most of those around him. He never wasted a moment and he had a firm handshake. He smoked and loved and never listened to anyone, thinking that he had a higher level of intelligence than his companions, and he was open about it. It was true, though, and so no one ever complained about his arrogance; it was expected and we were all in too much awe.
[tab][/tab]I remember asking him why he loved me. I felt, and still feel, that I was absolutely nothing in comparison to all that he was, the way he lived back then. He took a moment to answer, taking another drag from his cigarette before exhaling and pinching my nose.
[tab][/tab]I just love you, Jen. You’re so soft, and you get me. You’re someone who could be smarter than me if you didn’t enjoy observation so much. You’re just...
[tab][/tab]And he never finished.
[tab][/tab]I suspect he’s quite different now. I haven’t seen him in six years. All of this is hanging from a period of eighteen months that we shared when we were twenty and twenty-one, and a day on which we saw each other again for a few minutes at the age of twenty-four. We are now thirty years old. I have become more like what he used to be while he himself no longer resembles the auspicious source of light that he was. But I am writing, and he is still in my blood.






.

[Amadeus]

This is a very good opening for what could be a novel? Some very nice touches.

Gaz

[David]

I like this as well, although there does appear to be a fair bit of back-slapping going on. He's great, but he thinks you could be even greater than him. You sound like a perfect couple (despite your protestations to the contrary), and that could be a problem.

Still, very well written. I would read on, but I would be looking for a few flies in this ointment.

Can I, without being a figure of overweening patriarchal authority, just point out, dear girl, that you are probably not keeping up your crit to personal posting ratio? Two (at least) for every one. If you care what we think, show you care about what we write. (I'm using "we" in the most unroyal sense possible there.)

Cheers

David

[thefallofRome]

.


Shoot beans.

I completely forgot about that; thank you for reminding me!

*rushes off to critique.*





.

[Lake]

I enjoyed reading this piece, too. I've got a mixed feeling, it is a good thing though.
There is no complaints, no grumble; but between the calm lines, I can feel the emotion.
The second paragraph is especially moving to me.