State of Being

[pseud]

What is the point of a telephone?
That I can hear your frequent blink and twitch.
Your silence is more than empty, never cold,
well-timed.
Hours, hours, with you in my ear,
singing or crying, encouraging each word.
I will gladly listen.
I will gladly tell you that you’re beautiful,
not annoying, swear it. But you hang up.


----
a work completed the other night at 4 in the morning.

[juliadebeauvoir]

Don't you know that all the best stuff comes at us in the middle of the night? I liked it's freshness, it's conversational tone and it's abruptness at the end just like a hung up phone.
Enjoyed it,
Julia

[Duncan Williams.]

great poem, we all have our telephone stories, from time to time. cheers Duncan.

[cooladd]

I think it's great to write in the middle of the night, it's a quiet peaceful time, and theres no sunlight to distract. I like this poem, sounds like my life story.

[lemony]

I really like this - it tells me a wonderful story, and takes me through a whole ream of emotions.

I love, 'blink and twitch', I love the repetition of 'hours' - it almost feels painful. I can hear the desperation to get your message through to whoever is on the other end of the line - and then ... 'But you hang up'. It leaves me hanging -

Thank you for sharing.

[benjywenjy]

Hey

I agree the ending is really abrupt like being hung up on. Sounds very candid and open.
I like it a lot

benjy

[marm]

Well anything I was going to say has been said so I'll just say yes it was good and i liked it. Well done!