Haiku Train

[Jester]

Bring me some moonshine
and clear Sauvignon, mon.
Pa ack of Rizzla green,

[barrie]

Pack of rizla green?
As long as they all manage
to stick together.

[juliadebeauvoir]

To stick together,
flocks of a feather use some
Elmer's sticky glue.

[Jester]

Elmer's sticky glue
sticks rabbits to their carrots -
bugs bunnies to death

[barrie]

bugs bunnies to death,
lying silently in wait -
Mixomatosis.

[twoleftfeet]

Mixomatosis?
Can Sweet-eaters catch Pick'N
Mixomatosis?

[barrie]

Mixomatosis
Too many cooked sandwiches
Mixing my toasties.


I hear the groans

[twoleftfeet]

(I'm giving them voice)

Mixing my toasties,
Open fire, drinking tea and
toasting my tootsies

[barrie]

Toasting my tootsies
leads to terminal footrot
and amputation

[twoleftfeet]

And amputation
-for poor Lord Nelson's arm- meant
a salt water cure

[barrie]

a salt water cure
for overeating is bound
to bring something up.

[twoleftfeet]

"To bring something up
First take something down" said the
Actress, dictating


(to the bishop, of course)

[barrie]

Actress dictating -
"Can I use your dictophone?"
"No, use your finger!"

[Jester]

No, use your finger,
you thesbian minger, and
stand while you're talking.

[barrie]

Stand while you're talking,
stop picking your nose at once!
Sit down again boy!

[Jester]

sit down again boy!
And spit it out! What's with the
wise cracks in woodwork?

[barrie]

Wise cracks in woodwork
can harbour clever earwigs.
Here we go again!

[Jester]

Here we go again!
Earwigs at dawn - pincers poised
to pinch a punchline.

[barrie]

to pinch a punchline
is not a funny kind of
plagiarism

[twoleftfeet]

Pllagiarism
is best done to artists whose
Copyright expired

[Jester]

Copyright expired,
limp, after sweating over
a printing press

[twoleftfeet]

A printing press
misprint upset the libeled
Barclays Banker

[barrie]

A Barclay's banker;
very good rhyming slang for
a merchant banker.

[twoleftfeet]

A merchant banker
who was very insecure
about porn brokers

[barrie]

About porn brokers
questions are asked concerning
shop recognition.