Love through double glazing

[dl04]

It takes time to rain
and then it comes in flourishes
down and into pipes that nourish their tears.

My dad says 'love falls harder on different people'

Quiet, unassuming
but it hits us while we blink.
Like the birds that hang resigned on lamposts
they get certain shocks of love.

When i'm lost in double glazing,
i see the motions clearer
of love washed in rain
that our old windows concealed.

[keekee107]

I'm not usually one for 'nice' love poems (maybe that says a lot about myself, who knows?! ) but I did really like this.

I particularly loved:
'Quiet, unassuming'
A short line that stands out to me as partiucularly beautiful and speaks volumes for love itself. And I loved the sneaky rhymes in stanza 1 - the sonics used are beautiful.

The only nit I really have is in:
'they get certain shocks of love'
The wording 'certain shocks' just sounded all a bit too... clinical (?) for me. Didn't really fit with the rest of the poem and lovely feel you created - particularly with the sonics in stanza 1.

Overall, a very nice, accomplished piece of writing I feel .

[Brotherfergus]

Like KeeKee, I'm not usually one for nice poetry in most its forms but I enjoyed reading this. I've been sat inside due to the rain and feeling a bit... 'irritated' shall we say. But reading this has calmed me down a fair bit and I'm now enjoying the sight of the rain. May of just caught me at the right moment but in any case I liked it.
Particularly like;

"but it hits us while we blink."

Its a very visual line for me, opening your eyes to a new world and all that, ha!

Anyway, can't offer any technical comments but very much enjoyed.

[oddball]

I enjoyed this. The sentiment is generally understated except for the 'shocks of love' bit, which stood out kinda uncomfortably for me too. Other than that, it has a gentle feel to it that I liked.