Joseph of arrhythmia

[David]

Jumping Joe, or Jolting Joe, they called him.
He couldn't sing,
and he certainly couldn't dance,
but he had something -
unorthodox
and uncoordinated.
After many slightly jerky
years on the road,
he came at last to Glastonbury,
and that was it.

Sometimes you do something just for the title.

[twoleftfeet]

David,

Most amusing - but it needs a stronger ending IMHO

Geoff

[barrie]

Jumping Joe, or Jolting Joe, they called him. - Maybe you should choose one name -

Jolting Joe, they called him - (Jittering Joe?)

Why not leave out the last line and end on -

After many slightly jerky
years on the road,
he came at last to Glastonbury.

Pity you couldn't get a thorn in somewhere.

BTW - I hear BPA are trying to contact you. I thought Geoff might have mentioned it.

nice one

Barrie

[twoleftfeet]

Barrie,

Haven't you heard? David now runs the BPA:
viewtopic.php?f=24&t=6063&hilit=bpa

BTW David,
Is Joe's band "The Crazy World of Arthur" ? (Saw them ON TOR once with Dickie Heart and the Pacemakers..)

Geoff

[TDF]

little thing but:

unorthodox
and uncoordinated.

Thought that worked beautifully.

TDF

[emuse]

David I feel like a dolt but I don't understand the connection to place. I'd like to join in but I feel detached not understanding the references to the subject. How did other's get what I didn't?

e

[TDF]

How did other's get what I didn't?

e

haha, don't feel too bad, I didn't really get that either.

[twoleftfeet]

E / TDF,

Glastonbury is the site of an annual Rock festival PLUS the Abbey is associated with legends surrounding the
Holy Grail, Joseph of Arimathea and King Arthur
http://www.britainexpress.com/Myths/Glastonbury.htm

Geoff

[TDF]

See I figured it was something like that... but I couldn't quite link that with heart palpitations. Is it just a play on words, or is there some relevence to that?

TDF

[twoleftfeet]

See I figured it was something like that... but I couldn't quite link that with heart palpitations. Is it just a play on words, or is there some relevence to that?

TDF

Yep - The heart condition arrhythmia obviously affects electric guitarists (sometimes rhythm, but mostly lead )

AC/DC

[du bois]

I enjoyed the style here, offbeat. The ending though, as others have said, does seem somewhat abrupt.

[David]

Yep, I think I've cheated a bit with the arrhythmia thing. It sounds as though it ought to mean, besides the medical condition, a lack of rhythm. Unfortunately, I don't think it does. Am I abashed? Not a tall.

Ah, the BPA - just when I think I've escaped their clutches ... they're like the moonies, you know.

Cheers

David

[barrie]

Yep, I think I've cheated a bit with the arrhythmia thing. It sounds as though it ought to mean, besides the medical condition, a lack of rhythm. Unfortunately, I don't think it does.

- That's what I first thought - I checked my (Chambers) dictionary, it can also mean simply having an irregular or interrupted rhythm, as well as the medical condition.

Barrie

[David]

Yep, I think I've cheated a bit with the arrhythmia thing. It sounds as though it ought to mean, besides the medical condition, a lack of rhythm. Unfortunately, I don't think it does.

- That's what I first thought - I checked my (Chambers) dictionary, it can also mean simply having an irregular or interrupted rhythm, as well as the medical condition.

Barrie

Hurrah! Thanks Barrie. You've saved my pome.

[emuse]

Ah now that I have that frame of reference I like it quite well. In this case, Jumping Joe Joe was not a man who thought he was a woman (argh did I say that?) I think the final line could take us a little further. Apart from this it made me smile. What more can you ask from a poem?

e

[David]

In this case, Jumping Joe Joe was not a man who thought he was a woman (argh did I say that?)

e

You certainly did. Can I have some of what you're drinking, or smoking, or taking intravenously? Well, maybe not the latter.

The chaps have mentioned the last line as well, e. Clearly some fixin' required.

Cheers

David

[ElleW]

Hi David,

This took me a couple of reads, but I grinned both times. Consider using a capital on arryhtmia in the title... it would make the play on place seem stronger. The ending ("that was it") seems very ambiguous to me and I'd love to see the Glastonbury connection developed a little. Does he come to die of heart failure there? To perform?

Interesting read, David.

Cheers,
L

[beautifulloser]

Big D

Also a bit detatched from this one, however I am aware of the Grail stuff, been to the Glasto Tor and things, however I still didn't get it.

So, I'm not totally ignorant of it, partially perhaps, I wonder if you can do more in the poem to transfer some information to give it a bit of context? If that makes any sense. Maybe Geoff's point is where it is, the ending . . .

I dunno mate, hope it's vaguely useful.

me
x

[twoleftfeet]

Ah now that I have that frame of reference I like it quite well. In this case, Jumping Joe Joe was not a man who thought he was a woman (argh did I say that?) I think the final line could take us a little further. Apart from this it made me smile. What more can you ask from a poem?

e

Clearly the BPA (Bad Puns Anonymous) is not up to the task of monitoring PG, so I'm afraid I'm going to have to complain to OFPUN.

I note that some of the worst offenders are MODERATORS of this site! DIGRACEFUL!

If my complaint is not taken seriously then you can all expect to be named and shamed on WATCHDOGGEREL.

Standards here have been slipping ever since that excellent poet Kilravluis stopped posting.

General Motors (retired)