Cracking ...

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Raine
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Tue Jan 19, 2010 10:47 pm

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Cracking ...

It’s my kitchen, egg sucker!
You can’t stand the heat so
Go and crumble cookies
Somewhere else.

Too
many
sous,
Already broke the broth ya know
And now you’re making omelette
Without cracking it
or spilling?

Half full; half empty;
Do I care? Uh .. No !
No point crying duck
Or passing on your suck tricks.

I’m a grandma too
And it’s absolutely true you know
You can’t teach a smartarse
Or old dog nowt.

.
All aspects of language are tools of the poet; line-broken narrative serves an intent.
Take cliché, miss pelling and hyphen'd syllabics. Mould them with form and artistic intent. :-)
ray miller
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Wed Jan 20, 2010 10:59 am

I think you should call it The Proverbial...
The line lengths and use of capitals seems a bit arbitrary.
I thought this bit didn't work terribly well "No point crying duck Or passing on your suck tricks".
I'm out of faith and in my cups
I contemplate such bitter stuff.
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twoleftfeet
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Wed Jan 20, 2010 1:42 pm

ray miller wrote: I thought this bit didn't work terribly well "No point crying duck Or passing on your suck tricks".
I second that.
Also, at the risk of seeming thick, I didn't get "sous".

An nice melange of proverbs, but IMHO it could be a bit longer.

Geoff
peterkiggin
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Thu Jan 21, 2010 10:50 am

cracking I should cocoa in a misery of words collectively meaning duck all you make me laugh and pull the udder one old woman indeed I'd count the fairies round your head before speaking out of turn like that again my sunshine and cockles and all that perrrrrlarvour but seriously and I do mean this seriously it was fantastic to hear something new instead of the sounds of some cream crackered out of date type writer.
David
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Fri Jan 22, 2010 8:12 pm

peterkiggin wrote:cracking I should cocoa in a misery of words collectively meaning duck all you make me laugh and pull the udder one old woman indeed I'd count the fairies round your head before speaking out of turn like that again my sunshine and cockles and all that perrrrrlarvour but seriously and I do mean this seriously it was fantastic to hear something new instead of the sounds of some cream crackered out of date type writer.
Yes, well ...

Anyway, Raine, Ray's suggestion about "the proverbial" is quite a good one. I think you're having fun with some of those old phrases, and it is fun. (If there's a deeper meaning it passed me by completely, but deeper meanings do that to me.)

Cheers

David
Raine
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Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:53 pm

Thanks everyone. I like the 'proverbials' suggestion. I'll use that, thank you. As for deeper meaning you won't find any, there isn't one. It's just a frippery for its own sake. Nothing more important than a bit of fun with words and stuff. :mrgreen:
All aspects of language are tools of the poet; line-broken narrative serves an intent.
Take cliché, miss pelling and hyphen'd syllabics. Mould them with form and artistic intent. :-)
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