**
electric arcs
dissect looming clouds--
a rain dies suddenly
**
loony beggar
scrutinizes
my uneasiness
**
melancholy elbows
press against table top--
one dragonfly wanders
**
teardrop
rolls down a frail cheek--
mélange of sunset hues
**
end of bridge
lost in fog--
she looks at me
**
row of Moai
watch moon rise
through centuries
**
[ 'Moai' : http://www.answers.com/topic/moai]
Without any reason
I thought of this like it was a stream of consciousness poem--but hardly think its without any reason. If you really keep reading you sense a 'meloncholy' about the poem. You could even switch the verses around or lines. It made me want to play with it so I hope you don't mind.
electric arcs
dissect looming clouds--
a rain dies suddenly
end of bridge
lost in fog--
she looks at me
teardrop
rolls down a frail cheek--
mélange of sunset hues
melancholy elbows
press against table top--
scrutinizes
my uneasiness
Or take the last line from each verse:
one dragonfly wanders
a rain dies suddenly
mélange of sunset hues
my uneasiness
she looks at me
through centuries
So, imo everything works and has a real reason behind it. I think this was a good excercise in 'letting go' of the typical "I must write this poem in a chronological and sensical order.'
Bella
electric arcs
dissect looming clouds--
a rain dies suddenly
end of bridge
lost in fog--
she looks at me
teardrop
rolls down a frail cheek--
mélange of sunset hues
melancholy elbows
press against table top--
scrutinizes
my uneasiness
Or take the last line from each verse:
one dragonfly wanders
a rain dies suddenly
mélange of sunset hues
my uneasiness
she looks at me
through centuries
So, imo everything works and has a real reason behind it. I think this was a good excercise in 'letting go' of the typical "I must write this poem in a chronological and sensical order.'
Bella
Thanks Bella for your thoughts and suggestions. I actually tried out a string of Ku poetry. Thank you.
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Each line says so much, in the space of only 3-4 words. A very nice poem!
Best
Mark
Best
Mark
Thanks Mark for your reply.
Thank you for saying that, Lovely. Smiles.